& Vulnerably Slow…

Can I be real for a second? Recently, I’ve felt uncreative, restless, unuseful, insensitive, and extremely introverted.

The few creative moments I’ve found have been in coffee shops with a novel, marinating the text in my thoughts for a couple hours. Or wandering around the house catching bits of a podcast in the background. Or sketching styles that I’m unfamiliar with. Or listening to people I hardly know people sitting at my kitchen table.

It’s a weak & vulnerably slow kind of creativity.

I feel half awake at a a kind of blind date with other ideas and perspectives, and I’m not so sure how to jump back into the life-conversation with my own perspective.

What an unsafe place to be if I’m not collecting my footing and grounding myself in truth. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever (Heb 13:8), and yet I’m just trying to figure out who I am day-to-day.

Wow, I’m weak without Christ.

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It’s more that I’m holding back from a lot of things, specifically the creative process, because I’m unsure of myself based on some recent events. I want to jump back in, but I want even more to be sure.

Conflicting, you know?