Quitting

I was looking for a place where I may write about my experience with the stop smoking aide Chantix. I figured it would be a good idea, because someday someone else will have a desire to quit. They will think about using Chantix and will want real life experience with the product.

As of today I am 35 years of age. I have been smoking on and off since I was about 18. The longest I have ever gone without smoking was from age 24–30. I had a great run.

During the six years that I was smoke free I 100% attribute that to patches as well as a drastic change in my environment. It’s pretty difficult to quit smoking when you’re around people that smoke.

Over the years I have stopped and quit. My next longest run was for two years. One of the biggest reason I decided to try Chantix is because I had developed a belief that with the patches that I could quit whenever I wanted so I wasn’t taken quitting seriously in any of my latest attempts.

I knew it was time to start taking quitting seriously when I went to visit my 34 year old sister in hospice last week. No, she’s not dying of lung cancer, but she is dying of cancer. Until you watch someone die from cancer you will never (and I mean never) have a greater appreciation for life. After seeing her, there’s just no way I can continue to take my life for granted.

See, I have been having the prescription for Chantix on file with my at home RX mail program for about a year. Actually, I asked my doctor for it when I found out she had cancer. I just didn’t want to spend the $75 out of pocket cost to purchase it. Crazy huh? I spend typically $7 every other day for smokes, but I didn’t want to spend $75 to quit.

Today I am on day two and I must say it’s amazing. Modern day medicine is simply amazing. I could tell from day one that it was working and doing everything the box said that it would. I almost instantly felt the desire and urge go away.

I was a little worried at first, because after reading the material it mentioned things like anger, aggression, depression, and hallucination. And I didn’t want to have some sort of break down. But after my first day of taking the pill I was fine. Initially, I missed the part where it stated to only take the pill after eating. I guess I was so eager to try it I didn’t eat and within a couple of hours I felt like I was being swallowed from the inside out. I immediately left work and got something to eat. Then I was fine. I do notice that my mouth seems a bit dry. Sleeping that night was also fine. I did experience extreme pain on the left side of my temple. I don’t know if it had anything to do with the meds or not.

Also, just for complete transparency I have had several stressful smoke triggers over the last couple of days and had absolutely no desire to run to the store and buy smokes. It’s almost like it’s not even an option to smoke.

For some reason my guy wants to argue and fight today. He’s been kind of irritable since yesterday and now today he’s created several baseless unprovoked arguments that I completely have no idea where it’s stemming from. And through it all, absolutely no desire at all to smoke. I’ve been telling him since he started up that he is full of the devil. And now that I’m writing, it seems a bit more true, because anytime you try to change for the good and become a better you, the devil will come along and try to stop you. The devil knows that he can’t get into me so he’s in my man.

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