You qualify yourself by putting yourself in the role, and acting into that role. Your behavior shapes your identity. You can become who you intend to be if you begin living that way, today. Not tomorrow.
This is a matter of stewardship. Rather than wanting more, more, more , it’s key to take proper care of what you currently have. As Paul Arden said, “Don’t look for the next opportunity. The one you have in hand is the opportunity.”
Find that child inside of you and never stop learning. Kids learn to walk because they have to. They learn math and reading in societies where it’s required. They learn whatever the norms of their environment require them to learn. Once learned, they stop learning as much. Unless they continually change their environment and situation. Hence, when the student is ready, the teacher appears. When the student is truly ready, the teacher disappears.
Dallin Oaks once said, “We should be careful not to exhaust our available time on things that are merely good and leave little time for that which is better or best.” Your life and who you become is entirely shaped by the quality of your decision making.
Adaptability — according to Charles Darwin, it’s not the smartest or the strongest that survive, but the most adaptable to change. Most people believe that children are more adaptive than adults. Children, after all, can learn multiple languages at one time, if given the opportunity. Adults seem to become more rigid and less adaptive. Or so the thinking goes. The truth — children have more to adapt to. They’re required to learn and figure stuff out in order to survive in society. As you grow older, you have less to learn in order to survive in society and to meet the expectations of the norms around you. Yet, if you were to continually put yourself into higher and more demanding situations, you could adapt. You could adapt faster, actually, than children, because you already have so many deep and powerful connections made. The key, is being willing to let go of the models which are no longer effective at the higher stages of adaptability. If you want to adjust to new norms, you’ll have to adapt to them. And you can.
In transformational relationships — both people are “givers” who contribute to the ongoing evolution of the relationship. The whole becomes different from the sum of the parts. There is high expectations in these relationships, but also openness.
This is how TRANSFORMATION occurs. Only those who engage in collaboration actually experience true transformation. People who only work well by themselves are stuck in their own narrow worldview and agendas.
Beyond acknowledging your dependence, constantly express your appreciation to the people in your life. That which you appreciate, appreciates. Relationships are assets that can and should grow bigger and better over time. As the brilliant entrepreneur Michael Fishman has said, “Self-made is an illusion. There are many people who played divine roles in you having the life that you have today. Be sure to let them know how grateful you are.”