Hard-to-swallow pills for people with anxiety

Anxiety is a real disorder and it comes in many forms.

Photo by Matteo Badini on Unsplash

I am not a specialist, but sometimes I see or know people who tend to generalize this disease as if it were something that everyone could decipher, and it is not like that.

The symptoms that I may experience in my personal life may not be the same as other people experience. In fact, anxiety can arise from specific cases or it can have its origin in other mental disorders.

On the other hand, there is also the issue of empathy and communication, where I usually see a lot of information that seeks to encourage people (without anxiety disorders) to provide unconditional support to those who do suffer from them.

Don’t get me wrong. That sounds great to me, but as someone who suffers from anxiety and depression, not everything is black and white. The fact of having anxiety does not mean that we always have to receive that “understanding” from family and friends, it does not mean that we cannot control our episodes by ourselves or that we are free to abuse the patience of others.

My thought is that all, absolutely all people have problems in their lives, they face bad days, sometimes they do not have the strength to continue, they can behave in an irritable way, etc. And that’s fine! We can’t always be getting the perfect support or healthy, calm conversation that we all need or want.

That is why I decided to make a list of hard-to-swallow pills, after considering those moments when I have felt very anxious and have not received the desired response or support from those who know me without thinking about their shitty days and life struggles.

Let’s take a look:

1. Suffering from anxiety does not make you more or less special than others. Everyone deals with their own crosses.

2. Suffering from anxiety is not a trait of your personality, it is a disorder.

3. Some people with anxiety do not have to understand yours. Many experiences different symptoms and episodes.

4. If a person does not know that you suffer from anxiety and tells you “Calm down, everything’s ok”, you do not have to act like an asshole. Remember people are not fortune tellers.

5. There are people who will not be there for you all the time and that does not mean they do not care.

6. You don’t have to wait for people to empathize with you all the time just because you suffer from anxiety.

7. What you feel is something normal and valid that requires your interest to improve, it is not the responsibility of others.

8. Your friends or loved ones have the right to lose patience when they feel overwhelmed by your reactions. You can’t wait for them to understand you all the time. They are human too.

9. The fact of not having the company or time of others to vent, does not mean that you cannot improve. It is up to you to seek help and advocate for yourself.

10. Not all the people who are by your side are the best support and do not have the best intentions. Sometimes they just want to know more about you to criticize you behind your back, judge you, and promote your anxiety attacks.

11. We live in difficult times and anxiety is not a disease that only affects you or a small group of people.

12. Sometimes pessimism does not come from others but from your thoughts and how you see yourself.

13. The fact of generalizing your thoughts does not grant you the truth.

14. Anxiety does not free you from real guilt. Sometimes you can react very rudely or be very frivolous and that causes harm to others.

As you can see, my point is simple: Advocate for yourself because sometimes company, empathy or communication will not always be the magic key to your recovery.

In addition, those who support us can also feel drawn into our world, right to that part that we hate.

I’m not saying that we have to deal with our shit alone and not get the support we want, but in the end, change starts with ourselves because by taking care of ourselves we can also protect those who matter most to us.

Life is beautiful, but it is also screwed up. We are all unique and important.





Hi, call me Ness -she/they- :) I’m a journalist (that’s my alter ego) a social media enthusiast and I talk about anxiety and depression.

Love podcasts or audiobooks? Learn on the go with our new app.

Recommended from Medium

I Lost a Friend to Mental Illness, But It’s Not What You Think

That’s Not Anxiety You’re Feeling

10 Ways to Get Along with Anxiety

What My Therapy Dog Has Taught Me About Life

The Art Of Being Sick

Boundaries also exist at work: No boss will advocate for you

Black dog nipping in the dead of night…

Why I’m becoming the second documented woman in history to travel to every country in the world.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store


Hi, call me Ness -she/they- :) I’m a journalist (that’s my alter ego) a social media enthusiast and I talk about anxiety and depression.

More from Medium

The Idea of Confidence, is it Cocky?

Self-improvement: That’s something we all want.

Think you’re the only one having a hard time making friends? You’re not alone.

You Need To Get Out Of The ‘Excuse Trap’ Right Now

Money in a forest sitting on a tree and starring the sky