When Is It Okay To Ever Ask Me How I Contracted HIV? Umm. Never.

When Danny Pintauro pissed off HIV activists everywhere after he pointed his finger at himself and answered how he believed he was exposed and contracted the virus — through oral sex — I laughed.

Then I was mad.

Now, I am appalled.

But my feelings were only first pointed towards Danny. When I laughed, it was out of activist instinct to try and dismantle the media firestorm that he would cause, making everyone scared of those living with HIV, yet again. This time all over the least risky sexual activity [oral sex], in my non-expert opinion. I laughed because I felt sorry that Danny actually believed that he contracted HIV exactly THAT way. I thought he obviously is either: a bad liar or a good storyteller.

I, then, got mad. I was mad at Danny for using his situation to help make himself look better by actually stepping on everyone’s toes that are living with HIV, by spreading misinformation and not discussing how relatively small the risk of oral sex actually really is. I am pissed that the media was featuring this “Who’s the Boss” child actor’s story. I thought, he is gonna ruin the work of HIV activists all in a matter of days, from his media tour. He hasn’t. Probably because he won’t. How selfish of me to assume something else.

Those feelings have finally landed me to being appalled. I’m shocked by some of the positive community member’s ready to write him off. I’m really shocked by anyone ever believing that it was cool to even ask how he contracted HIV.

It really isn’t any of our business. And it shouldn’t be.

When would it be okay to ever ask anyone how they were exposed and contracted HIV? Never.

You can be the judge of whether his admission is helpful or not. But, we should all agree the details do not always need to be shared.

I’m over it.