Bless my feed, Dear Gods of Medium.
Dear Medium Staff or whomsoever it may concern,
Please Bless my feed.
No, I’m serious, all I’m seeing these days on my feed are posts like — How to become Batman, or 101 super easy ways to become a Batman (okay, you can never be me…. I’m Batman bitches)
Here’s the thing right, I already got my parents/professors/cousins/ basically everyone around me telling me to be productive and do things that will make me successful, I don’t need posts on Medium to push it down my throat again. I’m just gonna puke all that up, and continue to be the lazy ass that I am, plus now that I puked I’ll be sick and disgusting. Do you really want that? Yeah, I thought so.
I followed all the right publications and all the right people on Medium who post things that I like (fiction and poetry) but still I get posts about how to become an entrepreneur or some two-digit number ways to become productive or something which basically says —
Carpe Diem or
Seize the day(wait it’s the same as Carpe Diem right?) See, what it’s turning me into?
I don’t want to be an entrepreneur, I don’t want to earn a million dollars with a single decision, and for sure as shit I don’t want to start a million dollar company while I’m in my college(I just want to pass the semester. That’s it) I just want unicorns and Dinosaurs and Fire breathing Dragons which I’m going to slay with my Dragon Slayer riding my unicorn.
You can judge me all you want, go ahead get it all out of your brain. I don’t mind. I just want some peace and quiet when I get on the site and not some super motivational posts burning me down telling me what I’m doing wrong or what I can do to make my self more successful/productive/inspirational/whatever-that-word-is.
Simple as that.
So what do I want? I want stories that make me forget the bad day I had, I want those poetry lines to wash away my sadness, I want those funny posts about writer’s experiences that make me laugh. Is that too much to ask?
To put it simply — I like stories, fictional stories, stories about people’s experiences, poetry, haikus, or narrations that take you to another dimension and making you laugh, cry, smile all at the same time. I don’t want those super motivational,inspirational, life-changing advice that make me rethink my entire life.
If I want to dedicate two minutes of my life to read about 20 mistakes I’m making in my twenties, I can just ask my mom, and guess what, she shouts them at me. Or if she’s in the mood the number even goes to 50. So, thanks, but no thanks for posting those advice. It’s not that they aren’t good, they’re too good for me.
It’s not you it’s me. I’m just not that into you.
So, please Gods of Medium if you’re reading this from above your desks, I request you, I beg you, I… yeah, I ran out of words, anyway you get my point right. Bring those stories back. At least on my feed. Because I followed those tags and publications. I did my homework.
I know this will be just a shout in the void or a drunken text to ex, but sometimes exes text you back right? No seriously, do they text back?(I don’t know. I’ve never had an ex. I’ve never had a BF either. So… do they?)
Bah, to hell with those drunken texts, the shout into the void thing, sometimes it echoes back right? No seriously, I’m asking a question.
So, again I’m asking you Please O’ Please — Bless my feed.