HBO Insecure Season 4 Ep. 1 (recap)

5 Questions from them show that left us speechless.

We look to get some more insight on a few questions.
1. What is Dating?
2. What’s up with Issa’s new boo?
3. Can you be friend’s with your ex’s current partner?
4. Is Molly self projecting?
5. How to define lines in a friendship and went to cut them off?

Let’s Define Dating…

Sola:
What is the difference between Talkin & Datin?
Apparently Molly and her boo thing are were under different impressions about their relationships. I can admit, Im not sure what the difference between dating and talkin or even if there is a difference.

Nina:
There are different stages in dating… collectively I’ve heard of

• Talking — we’re getting to know one each other, and likely we’re getting to know some other people too!
• Dating — talking regularly, spending more time together 1:1, could lead to an exclusive relationship but, we’re still open
• Dating Exclusively — a potential pre-stage to being in a relationship.
• In a relationship — exclusive (if that’s what’s decided) relationship with one other person.

The key is COMMUNICATION. We shouldn’t guess what stage we’re in. We grown. Ask questions, and feel comfortable sharing what you want. All Molly needed to do was speak up, and say the truth of what she was doing & what she wants now, and in the future with him.

Baggage Check!

What’s up with Issa an the TSA dude?
If Issa had a type this aint it. So I thought what is the infatuation with our friend from TSA? What qualities do you like for in a person?

Sola:
I just chalk it up to Issa being Issa. However, dude does have personality and she seems to be comfortable around him, (extremely). Expanding on that, I think Issa is at a place where she values dependability and support. Im curious to see how this plays out through out the season.

Nina:
He’s just a meantime in-between time dude. Issa’s not really interested in him, but he’s a good place filler for the current moment. Beyond sex, he comes with many other benefits such as free liquor, and event security. Win-win. No?

It’s a small world after all.

Can you be friends with your ex’s new partner? Easier said than done as we see Issa trying to navigate those rough waters.

Nina:
Simple answer -yes. But some factors need to be adresses:

- Do I still have feelings for said ex? Does he/she still have feelings for me?

- What’s the vibe like currently between the ex’s, what’s yalls’ history?

- Can YOU be friends with your ex’s partner? Haha I think we all have different things that we can handle. You could answer points 1 & 2, including any other important notes, go from there.

I think Issa can. She’s handled it well so far.

Sola:
I know this feeling all to well. In the town I went to college is significantly small. I have been many vertices of the love triangle. Dealing with an ex’s new boo depends on one’s maturity level. Im not ashamed to say there were some instances were I was envious and upset, others were I was the bigger man (pun intended).

Furthermore, what’s the reason for the interacting with you and the new boo? Is it class, work, it ain’t about the money or coparenting then I wouldn’t be open to it. Im good love.

Thinking out loud

Is Molly self projecting when she calls Issa messy.

Nina:
Could be. Molly should focus on herself, and really just be a listening ear for her friend.

Sola:
There is a lot to unpack there. So far in the series Molly has been a positive factor in Issa’s life but now that Issa is getting her life together. Molly is throwing shade. However, as we look at Molly’s life she is the one who needs to spring clean (metaphorically).

Cutting Ties

Sola:
We hate to see it but sometimes it happens. The show opens up with Issa saying she dont F*ck with Molly no more. Never thought we’d see the day and it’s still early. We don’t see exactly what happens but it’s coming. My question is what point do you cut a close friend (A1 Day1) loose?

Sometime people outgrow each other. Life happens and we adapt. In the world of the late and great Nipsey Hussle “Circle Got Smaller Everybody Can’t Go”.

Nina:
Boundaries. Discover what yours are and share them unapologetically to necessary individuals. If said person isn’t respecting those, revisit the conversations, and there may become a time to cut ties