My First Crush, And The Plot Twist That Ensued
Your first crush. The one you’ll remember forever. The first person you looked at, interacted with, who you thought hey, I could love you.
Probably, they were the embodiment of perfection. If not to everyone, to you, at least. With every step they took, with every joke they made, you could practically feel yourself falling even more in love with them. Well, whatever your twelve/thirteen year old self thought love was.
As you got older, as you grew out of the crush, you probably looked back on it and thought I liked them? It appears the person you “loved” oh-so-much maybe wasn’t exactly what you painted them in your mind.
Is this just me? I sure hope not. Either way, this is the story of my first crush and of how wrong I was about them.
People aren’t always who they appear to be.
To my thirteen-year-old mind, he was perfect. Athletic, passionate, funny, intelligent, not to mention attractive — he was the whole package…or so I thought.
Whenever we would interact, I would lose my breath — my heart would beat so hard and fast I felt like it would fly out of my chest. How foolish I had been to let him have so much power over me. As much as I adored the part of him I saw, I failed to consider the parts I didn’t see. I failed to consider the larger part of his human-ness.
The truth was revealed with a video.
I should’ve seen it coming. It wasn’t hard to tell he was from a not-so-great part of town with a not-so-great family. I neglected the signs, though. To me, he was perfect. I’d never expected this.
Here’s how it happened: a mutual of a mutual was at someone’s house where the aforementioned “he” was also at. There was a video involved. Basically, he was filmed in the midst of being stoned out of his mind.
It was bad, it was pitiful, it was disgusting. Though my feelings of romantic liking had already been fading, I still had an abundance of platonic love for him. I wanted to see him do well. I knew this was not the way to do that.
My vision — the idealistic vision that’d existed in my mind for so long — was shattered with three minutes of footage. He was no longer who I thought he was — not that he ever was.
He was — and still is — as human as you get.
Moral of the story: people aren’t always who you think. The boy who I’d imagined to be so perfect for so long, turned out to be just another broken human being.
It sucks. It’s a bad situation I’d love to help if I could. It’s also who he is. Not the perfectly charming, charismatic soccer player I’d dreamt up. Not the funny but sensitive guy I’d imagined. Just another kid who has little to no chance.
People aren’t always who they appear to be. Don’t make assumptions.
Hi! I hope you enjoyed reading that! Mostly, I hope it made sense. It was a piece I’ve been wanting to write for a while. Any constructive criticism is welcomed! Most of all, thanks for reading! ❤️