Hire for Empathy, Train for Everything Else.

The Gallup State of the Global Workplace Report finds a staggering 85% of the global workforce disengaged, which means workers are unattached to their work or downright resentful, and lack energy and passion for their jobs. It prompted the assessment that we are facing a worldwide employee engagement crisis. Despite numerous attempts to find solutions, in the United States (US), the percentage of engaged employees has barely changed since the beginning of the survey in 2000, moving from 26% (2000) to 34% (2018), versus 18% worldwide. Coincidentally, the empathy levels among our young population in the US have declined by 40% between 1979 and 2009. There aren’t enough studies to correlate the two, but we have one bit of precious information to rely on: the responses to the Gallup poll questions.

Companies started allocating hefty budgets to evaluation, analysis, and the globally-thriving team-building industry, but the gains, evidently, are modest. People leave their jobs in search of “meaning” more than ever before. What if the solution had been there all along, staring us in the face, as we obstinately chose to look away?

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Not to get religious on you from the get-go, folks, but I find it quite telling that one of the fundamental precepts of the Abrahamic doctrine is empathy. Whether you believe it to be true gospel, written by aliens, or simply an obsolete code of law used to regulate the lives of our ancestors, the wisdom behind certain tenets is indisputable.

Jack Ma, the founder of the e-commerce giant Alibaba, an exceptional mind with an endearing personality, told us during one of his speeches at the World Economic Forum in Davos: “to serve people better, you should have a service heart” and every time he speaks he makes it a point to emphasize that this has to be the century of wisdom and the age of looking inward. We cannot outrun a car, outfly a plane or outsmart a computer; it would be foolish to even try. If a machine can do it better, maybe that’s not where we should try to excel. We can instead choose to focus on that which I cannot imagine will be technologically replicated too soon — empathy, sensorial intelligence, introspection.

I’m particularly pleased to see the conversation tilt more and more toward empathy in the public arena and several personalities addressing it at a political level. Driving that conversation since his earliest run for the Mayor’s Office is presidential hopeful Cory Booker, the Democratic Senator from the great state of New Jersey, professing that finding love for one another will heal the nation and bridge the divide. It’s also the core message of Marianne Williamson’s campaign, a surprise candidate in the increasingly crowded Democratic primary arena. She’s a leader of the New Wave spirituality (the 90’s revival), with Oprah, Cher, Gwyneth Paltrow and many other celebrities hanging on her every word. She’s running on a platform favoring a return to love and patriotism among the people of the United States of America. An article on Buzz Feed News correctly points out that Marianne Williamson is famous in that way that you either know her intimately or have no idea who she is.

Then of course there’s the new media darling Pete Buttigieg. He perfectly combines an empathic and nurturing spirit with a “let’s get down to business” attitude, which is making him a rapidly rising star in this election. His subtle brand of love and inclusion might just make him the most authentic of the lot, so much so that him running as the first openly gay candidate is only part of the conversation. That might very well be the most powerful achievement of his candidacy to date.

To them all, I say: YES, let’s make empathy awareness part of the mainstream conversation. Is it what will transform the United States into one big cohesive society overnight and bring us salvation? NO. The process is complex, with deep institutional change needed in order to achieve far-reaching, sustainable, positive change. But, at least for now, we need to start talking about it. And perhaps hire a White House occupant with at least an inkling of empathy.

The case for a work environment based on empathy

I recently saw a job ad including empathy among its top requirements. I was thrilled. This company gets it. Sadly, this company is a rarity.

Let’s go back to the Gallup study. If you’re like me, you thought, hmm the year 2000, that can’t possibly provide conclusive data, 2000 was yesterday. Well, no. Shockingly, it’s 2019, so we now have almost two decades of quantifiable (and worrying) survey outcomes. Let me throw in here some more stats to impress the urgency of the situation upon you and augment your interest in my ensuing ruminations.

The latest report covers 155 countries and is chockablock with startling revelations. It separates employee engagement into three categories: engaged, not engaged, actively disengaged (the last two are grouped together in the disengaged category). In short: love, don’t care, hate.

Only 15% percent of the employees are engaged in their jobs, globally. So, what does engaged mean? “Employees are enthusiastic and highly involved in their workplace. They are psychological <owners>, drive performance and motivation, and move the organization forward.”

Western Europe is well below the global average with 10% engagement of its workers. In parts of the world where cultural barriers stand in the way of closer relationships at work, the numbers are dismal. In East Asia, only 6% of the workforce is engaged. Japan is scrambling to change its approach to professional life, which has so far generated burnout and ever-increasing suicide rates.

The Middle East Northern Africa (MENA) region has the highest number of actively disengaged workers at 22%. Gallup defines them as being “resentful that their needs aren’t being met, acting out their unhappiness, and actively undermining what their engaged coworkers accomplish”. More or less on par with their neighboring regions, 14% of the employees in MENA are engaged. The remaining workers are simply not engaged.

Here’s what the employees are telling us through this Gallup study: the companies fail at being flexible and at allowing them to identify, develop, and use their innate talents and abilities to capitalize on their strengths. The employees don’t feel heard or empowered. Consequently, they don’t see opportunities for their growth within the company. Most of them leave a workplace because of fraught relationships with their bosses.

And here’s what makes a business thrive on the engagement front, according to the report: psychological engagement, positive workplace relationships, frequent recognition, ongoing performance conversations, and opportunities for personal development. The businesses that rank highest according to these factors achieve 70% employee engagement, a striking percentage compared to the rest.

Essentially, all of the above engagement features represent a textbook definition of an empathy-based workplace, both in a broader sense and for very specific, technical applications.

But what is empathy?

Such a little, simple word for such a deep, complex mix of feelings. Let’s define that before we move any further.

Daniel Goleman explained that empathy is a consequential part of emotional intelligence; it means showing sensitivity toward and identifying yourself with other people.

There’s the cognitive kind, where one understands in a very rational way the other person’s feelings and reactions. That’s the psychopathic, manipulative kind. If you think psychopaths don’t have empathy, you’re wrong. They do, they just don’t care. It’s what makes them so good at, well, psychopathing. They know exactly how to get a specific emotional response from you, and they use this skill adeptly.

Then there’s the kind we’re aiming for. Emotional and compassionate empathy. That’s the ability to feel deeply for the person next to you, to understand their reactions and validate their feelings in a way that you would want yours to be validated. See and hear the others as you would want to be seen and heard. It is the ability to learn from someone’s pain and grow together through it. Empathy is the fundamental component of our human connection.

Think quickly, which public leader pops in your mind right now, one that has shown extraordinary empathic qualities recently?

If you instantly thought at Jacinda Ardern and her stellar ability to show both unwavering strength and heartfelt sympathy in the wake of a horrid tragedy, you win. You win at understanding leadership.

Empathy might not come as naturally to everyone but, as any other ability, it can be practiced until it becomes the norm. We have different backgrounds, experiences, and sensitivities. For some, it’s their nature to feel the other person’s emotions as powerfully as if they were their own. For others, it has to do more with manners and rational thought. But worry not, empathy is not a personality trait and it can very well be enhanced through education and exercise.

As an employer, is it your responsibility to cultivate an empathic work environment and choose managers who are able to uphold it. You should strive to create a virtuous circle: foster a culture that attracts the best and most empathic professionals and hire those people who are able to build and maintain it.

As you’ll see below, a case study in Germany shows that it is not enough to keep employees well paid and content with their jobs, investors increasingly make investment decisions based on your responsible practices as an employer and the chatter generated in the public space about your social awareness, and, possibly most important of it all, it might not be as easy as you think to find and hire that special brand of dedicated, empathic, purpose-seeking employee.

Why value and cultivate empathy above all else in a work environment? I’ll give you 3 reasons.

1. We need it. (duh)

I saved possibly the most consequential part of the Gallup poll for last. The German example. Spoiler alert: it’s not all good.

Although 69% of the German workers say that they’re satisfied or extremely satisfied with their company as a place to work, and 54% agree that they’re being paid appropriately, only 15% of them are engaged, 70% are not engaged and 15% are actively disengaged. That last group is estimated to cost the German economy between 80.3 billion and 105.1 billion euros per year in lost productivity.

What we’re measuring here is the level of support received by workers and their emotional attachment to the employer. The explanation is straight-forward. As is the case in most countries, the emotional well-being of the employees doesn’t register as important. The managers are selected based on their efficiency and productivity, not their leadership skills or their ability to care for, support, and empower their workers. Only 31% of the German employees say they do what they do best and are happy with their bosses. What Gallup tells us is that German companies are good at satisfying their employees and bad at engaging them.

We’ve established that engagement is largely based on empathy, so this is a very telling example. It explains that the reason behind the general apathy of the employees who just show up for work and lend the company their bodies and minds, without contributing their spirit and enthusiasm, is not so much an organizational structure or paycheck issue, but has more to do with the actual interaction at a team level.

Many people, even the growing number of freelancers working from home, wish to have a purpose and draw meaning from their work. Our careers increasingly become central to our identities and it is that search for making one’s mark in a way that speaks to us personally that drives us to leave well-paid corporate jobs.

Imagine what you, as an employer, would be able to achieve should you be able to retain that talent you’ve been investing in for years by offering them a work space that understands their needs, embraces their motivation to make an impact and their quest for meaning, and harnesses all that to achieve operational results.

2. It makes you look good in front of investors.

What do investors value most in a company’s leadership when they make an investment decision? Responsibility. Lately, they started looking for leaders who understand that leadership itself is a responsibility.

Over the past two decades, the business conversation surrounding maximizing shareholder returns shifted toward a holistic, shared value proposition for long-term stakeholder engagement. The former was meant to keep the pockets of shareholders and executives full at all costs, including the general undercutting of employee morale and spirit. Forcing employees into often abusive non-compete clauses became the norm and, for a long time, starting with the late 70’s, the management culture had been tilting towards coercion rather than engagement. In short, the shareholder value approach dropped the ball on the key ingredient which ensures a sustainable culture: a long-term employee-centered approach, so adeptly explained by John Kay through the principle of obliquity (achieving certain goals might require an indirect pursuit i.e. the most profitable companies are not the ones entirely focused on profit).

Luckily, the factors influencing many investment decisions today couldn’t be more different and the trend finally reached Wall Street too. Wall Street’s response (to what it must perceive as a nauseating rise in awareness, driving investment toward values-centered companies) comes from the first fund based entirely on ethical values that matter to the American public.

Building on recent innovations attracting a larger pool of private investors to the stock market by limiting the exposure to individual companies, such as the index funds and the exchange-traded funds (ETF), JUST U.S. Large Cap Equity ETF was launched last year. It recently became the Best New ESG ETF (ESG stands for environmental, social and governance factors).

Wondering just how mainstream this movement is? The fund was launched by billionaire investor Paul Tudor Jones and Goldman Sachs. Its Board include Deepak Chopra and Arianna Huffington. Wait, don’t roll your eyes just yet. Instead, take a look at their methodology and you’ll see they have a solid approach to establishing which companies make the cut based on thorough public opinion surveys in which respondents identify the business practices that most matter to them. Subsequently, large cap companies are judged by how they behave in those areas. The number one consideration is how companies treat their workers; number two, how they treat their customers.

Clearly, from this point forward, whether raising early stage funding or going public, your investment pitch better include employee engagement.

3. You’ll be hailed a pioneer of conscious capitalism. (No, it is not an oxymoron)

A rapidly expanding field of platforms aiming to democratize and simplify investment is emerging. They cater to the population at large, including categories that have traditionally been left behind, like youth, women, and medium-to-low income investors, by offering them easily accessible mobile investment apps.

Take for instance Dabbl, which allows you to instantly invest in your favorite brand by taking its picture or speaking its name, Fundrise, the first online investment vehicle in the U.S. real estate market, Learn App which teaches you how to invest and then urges you to apply your freshly-gained knowledge through their sister app MyWallSt, and the world’s first micro-investment app Acorns that rounds up your purchases to the dollar and then invests it for you. Brilliant stuff, right? And necessary too.

What’s their impact on companies? The investment decisions will be increasingly made based on how someone feels about your business and how supporting your business is making them feel about themselves. Are they able to brag about investing in your company on social media and urge others to do so as well?

Just over the past couple of years we have seen so many scandals and missteps from the major brands, like the racist rants of one of Dolce & Gabbana’s founders, the black face disaster from Gucci or the incredibly tone-deaf Pepsi commercial. Politicians like Elizabeth Warren and Alexandria Ocasio Cortez are holding businesses and their executives to account on social media and their followers are paying close attention.

We all try to construct an online persona that is as close to our ideals as possible, so the way your employees, customers, and investors come together on these platforms to talk about your achievements in doing right by everyone will be consequential. Just like you reward good behavior to see more of it within the ranks of your employees, so will they, the customers and the investors, be intimately liked to your business decisions through their growing ability to reward or penalize you publicly and financially.

And who wants to work for a shining example of conscious capitalism? Employees who seek purpose. The LinkedIn Purpose at Work report shows 38% of the study’s global participants value purpose as much as money as reasons to work; 40% in the US, 50% in Sweden and Germany. You’ll want those who seek purpose because they believe that work has the potential to be a meaningful part of their lives, as opposed to those who seek employment for money alone and see work as an unavoidable necessity. The study further shows that employees who look for purpose are more likely to be promoters of their employers, to stay longer with the company and reach higher levels of fulfillment with their work. They become intrapreneurs and put their innovative spirit to good use within your company.

However, getting them to work for you might not be as easy as you think. Remember that study saying that we lost empathy? This LinkedIn report reconfirms it: 48% of the baby boomers wanted purpose and only 30% of millennials do. Stunning, right? It turns out social media might not be as accurate as we thought in assessing facts about people (yet another shocker, I know).

How do you get those millennials on board? Go on, show them just how woke you are.

Here are 3 tools you can use to enable empathy in your work environment.

I’m not the only one here seeing the vicious circle that led to a pernicious loss of empathic abilities, am I?

Burnout (certainly not only in Japan although it seems to be at an extreme there), disengagement (despite a certain content with status and money as, again, is not only the case in Germany), disconnected leadership, focus on profits rather than people and abusing employees in that pursuit, they have all led us here. If we lose our capacity to connect with and feel deeply for other people, what have we got left, really?

Now that I’ve distressed you into paying attention, let’s take a look at how we can correct this upsetting trend.

What I’m proposing below is a combination of three practices to be used continuously, for the long haul, as part of a well-structured, holistic strategy of employee engagement. What we’ve been doing so far, immersing the team in short off-site events and activities to then just go back to business as usual, was never going to work. If we’re reluctant to try a new approach (and by reluctant I mean, we’re not really keen on spending the money and putting the effort in), we can certainly continue to hold hands and sign kumbaya twice a year, but you know what they say about repeating the same actions and expecting different results.
(they say it’s insanity, that’s what they say)

Company therapy

You know how when you have a broken ankle you go to the doctor to fix it? I’ve heard this analogy a lot for the past few years, in relation with mental health issues, but it can very well be applied to a broken work environment. The good news is, there are many, highly successful professionals who have dedicated their lives’ work to helping you succeed as an employer. Harvard’s Helen Riess is one of them. She is a leader in researching the neuroscience of emotions and has developed the tools to both assess the practice of empathy in a workplace and train it.

Specialized therapists can achieve groundbreaking results when they spend time observing interactions at work. They can customize an emotional training plan for each environment, which is likely to include the practice of basic techniques like eye contact, the very first step in making someone feel acknowledged, posture, affect, expressed emotions, tone of voice, and then a deeper analysis of, for instance, the response to the interaction between team members and the way they mirror each other.

Stress is a naturally occurring phenomenon and it is only natural for employees to have concerns and problems that cannot simply be left at the door when they walk into the office. Therapists can help identify, educate, and channel the team’s empathic dynamics and guide us toward achieving the impact we so long for: making a difference in the lives of those we so closely interact with at work. Therapists can screen personality traits and design a specific therapeutic approach. There is strong evidence that empathy training programs are effective. It is a method that gives employees professionally-vetted tools to manage and understand their emotions in a work context and feel validated at the same time.

It might be necessary for the coach or therapist to shadow the employees and observe interactions for months on end to be able to accurately finetune a strategy. It’s likely to be an uncomfortable conversation. It’s actually more uncomfortable for older professionals than it is for young, flexible employees, so time is not on our side on this one.

The question you need to ask yourself is, am I ready to be uncomfortable now in the short run for the assured long-term success of my team’s dynamic, or do I prefer to keep shoving the emotional dirt under the carpet hoping that it won’t clog our arteries? The thing about dirt — it gets harder to clean after a while, you get used to it and eventually the filth will become so ubiquitous that it will feel natural. Deeply deranged for someone looking in from the outside, but natural to all those caught in that mice trap. That’s when you’ve reached the point of no return and drastic action needs to be taken. That’s when you need to go back to the drawing board.

Most studies indicate that it is often a leadership problem and in instances where the leader is also the founder or the Innovator in Chief, it is only normal that they themselves would require an executive management coach.

As you think of a company’s growth like that of a house that you build brick by brick, imagine empathy training as its structural foundation.

Virtual Reality

Virtual Reality (VR) is possibly the clearest example that people long for empathic experiences, for deep connection and engagement with their peers. They line up for experiments which allow them to have emotions they would otherwise most likely never know, through the tech-induced “hacking” of their senses. The technology immerses you in an environment which can be as foreign to you as a different planet, the human body, the life of a refugee, a homeless person, or a prison inmate. Humanitarian organizations report a doubling of donations once the donors get to make use of the VR equipment made available at various events and fundraisers they attend.

So far VR has been getting a lot of traction for its social experiments. The issue with that is they can end when you choose, unlike the hardships faced by the downtrodden whose lives you experience for just a few minutes. I’m under no illusion that this is the solution to the mass desensitization that we are experiencing as a society at this moment, but it can make a difference. It can make you feel better about your life compared to the less fortunate, so it might not obtain the result initially sought, but at the same time it forces an introspection. Conversations abound these days around our lost ability to feel for the immigrants, for the less fortunate, for the needy. If you are to read only one conversation on the matter, let it be the one surrounding Behrouz Boochani’s book.

Encouraging studies show however a significant impact when using VR to train empathy in a workplace. A VR environment allows team mates to “embody” their colleagues through a perception and sensory illusion, in a manner to which humans have not been exposed until today. It feels like a dream, but the concept of immersive presence makes everything real. What does that mean? It is a multi-sensory, often highly interactive platform that tricks your body and mind into becoming emotionally invested through the use of multiple stimuli (video, audio, touch, scent).

The tridimensional headset cuts us off from the world around us, but it uses a 360-degree projection of an environment (it can be a room or a movie filmed with a 360 camera from the perspective of the headset user — you). To give you an example, a potential exercise can involve the filming of a script based on challenges faced at the office, which will then be experienced through the VR environment by the entire team as they constantly change roles.

Developing this kind of an intimately empathic understanding of our colleagues enhances our ability to recognize trigger warnings and prevent pernicious responses that can damage the fabric of the team or, even more consequential, prevent suicide, breakdowns, or a self-inflicted unhealthy behavior.

In my opinion, every single employer should facilitate the creation of a VR immersive environment. What kind of a feedback can be more powerful than seeing yourself from the perspective of the other and experiencing a deep immersion into the emotional and physical experiences of your colleagues?

Team building (I know, bear with me)

It doesn’t quite work now, does it? Have you been doing it right though?

We’re not talking about the kind where managers would rather twist themselves into pretzel shapes than face what’s actually wrong with their work environment. It’s been thoroughly established that it doesn’t work.

The right one, the kind that correctly creates the feeling of belonging to a group and exacerbates empathy, can lead to a positive in-group bias. It is achieved by having a design thinking approach to it, through emotional stimulants which in turn can act as powerful regulators of the mind itself.

Concretely, companies should facilitate the creation of an auxiliary environment where employees learn from each other. Think talent show meets MOOC. Outside of office hours, but on a regular schedule and on the company’s premises, the employees can teach their colleagues everything about a passion they have, a skill they excel at, or a talent they want to share, whether it is playing an instrument, baking a cake, shooting a film, taking a professional photograph, or teaching a foreign language. Just like a regular class room has the ability to bring us together at a human level and forge strong bonds, this kind of interactions are the missing ingredient to a much more personal, connected workspace.

Approach team building as a constant relationship management issue, not to be looked at only when there’s a problem, but include it in the overall strategy. Think process. See team building as a long-term process. Experiment together, collaborate. Include everyone. It is a fallacy to believe that only sales people or the commercial areas are central to the success of your business.

Employees are whole people and we cannot expect to bring out their full potential if we don’t treat them as such. We all like to feel special and we all have our unique traits that make us who we are. The more that uniqueness is recognized by the people who matter most to us (and our colleagues are exactly that), the more successful we will be and the more far-reaching relationships we will forge.

“I am pleased to see that we have differences. May we together become greater than the sum of both of us.” (Surak)

Three easy steps to practice empathy.

The key features of practicing empathy are renouncing self-centeredness and exercising humility through the understanding that we belong to a greater context, reflecting on our shortcomings and allowing ourselves to be curious about the others and amazed at the unique skill set we will discover they possess.

1. Catch yourself when being negative, judgmental, spiteful, dismissive, jealous. Remember that everyone fights a battle you might know nothing about.

2. Stay open and curious. Remember to wonder. Something will astound you every day, from random acts of kindness, gratitude and love, to people who you thought could have nothing in common with you and stories you didn’t know existed.

3. Be present and give yourself permission to be vulnerable. Vulnerability will allow you to create stronger bonds and presence will make you appreciate each moment. Remember that time flies but it never goes backwards, and neither can we.

Lastly, have a go at testing your empathy here.

This has been a long read, so if you’re going to remember one thing, remember this: prolonged periods of humiliation and conflict stemming from lack of empathy, in any environment, evolve not only into trauma with long-term damaging effects on the health of those involved, but also into a toxic context that can probably never be remedied, or the efforts to do so would be so great, they would outweigh the benefits of continuing to function within the same structure. Better not let it get anywhere near that point.

*The inclusion of several names and studies should not be perceived as an endorsement of any kind; they are merely there to explain my points and I derive no benefit whatsoever from mentioning them, nor am I connected to or looking for a connection with any of them.