In Conversation with my younger self
Leading a life which constantly runs forward, we hardly find time to look back at our younger self. Had we looked back we would’ve become aware of all the changes we had gone through to become the current self.
On a rare occasion as I set my mind on writing an article, I start to wonder that what point of time did I ever start writing. And then I travel down the memory lane.
As my thoughts wander through the years, I come across a girl of around 10 years.
Me: Hey, you are expected to be studying now. Infact you are supposed to note down the answer you have just mugged. But, you are just moving the pencil on paper. What’s that all about?
She: I am designing. Look I’ve created some beautiful designs. I don’t know what it means. I just love creating these and anyone who sees them appreciates me.
The little girl handed me the paper which was full of some random shapes and words filled with decorative strokes which looked somewhat like an amalgamation of doodle art and calligraphy.
Just a few minutes later,
Me: Hey, you are supposed to sit and study. Not sit and dance!
She: Relax! I am taking a break from these boring subjects. Anyway I am going to become a choreographer. I can dance all day and night. I don’t understand, why do I have to study when I can dance?
Me: You would soon get the answer. Anyway, there must be at least one subject which you like?
She: Nothing. Science looks a bit interesting. English is a bit peaceful. Social Studies is full of rubbish. And Maths! I only hope to manage the passing grade in that.
Me: What? You don’t like Maths? Like Seriously??
She: Yes, I hate Maths… I don’t understand it. And I don’t like subjects which I can’t feel or visualise. Mom has already made peace with the fact that I am going to suck at Maths.
Me: Oh Really? She would get a surprise soon.
On tuning my thoughts to a few years later, I come across a girl of around 13…
Me: Hey, what’s that in your hand? You never liked reading!!
She: Yes, it’s a newly acquired habit. I came across this autobiography of a girl of somewhat my age, so started reading it. And I even write now. Just a few days ago, I had composed a poem which got appreciated by my friends. Moreover I just secured the first position in a story writing competition.
Me: Great! By embracing books you have made a lifelong friend. And how is everything going on? School? Dance class? Drawing?
She: School is as usual boring. But fortunately I am now able to connect with two subjects. And they are saving my grads.
Me: And what are they?
She: Maths and Science. I was stupid to find maths terrifying whereas in reality it’s the easiest and the simplest of all the others. It requires no special effort, nothing much to remember. It’s straightforward and easy to score too.
Me: (smiling) I knew this was coming.
She: And by the way, I’ve joined a new dance class and I love it. I am improving and my dance style is being appreciated.
Me: Good Luck with that.
Some more years later, I came across this girl of around 15 years of age..
Me: Hey, what’s up?
She: Great! You would be shocked to know that I love studies now!
Me: Whoa!! And what about dance and art?
She: I had left art long ago. And I somewhat regret that. I could’ve taken art as a carrier had I not left it mid-way. The other day I meet my drawing Sir and he seem to regret my decision till today. Sometimes I do feel I can still give it some time. But dance is completely off the shelf. I shall appear for the dance exam for one last time and then give it a stop for time being.
Me: Why? Is that because of the pressure of board exams approaching?
She: Pressure?? No, I willing want to focus on studies and take a break from dance. Dance kinds of distracts me.
Me: So, what’s exactly in your mind now?
She: I love Physics. I want to become an Astrophysicist.
And that was probably the last version of me who could confidently say what she ‘wants to become’!