All Kinds Of Hot

We recently caught Trace Adkins’ “Ladies Love Country Boys” on the car radio, and for some reason, my nine-year-old daughter went gaga over it. Well, at least, she liked it enough to look for the video on YouTube, google the lyrics, and ask me what it all meant. I tried to explain the message of the song in the most wholesome way possible. Not that the song was anything raunchy, although you never know with today’s songs, but I thought it wasn’t really appropriate for that age, especially when she proceeded to ask questions like, “Do you love country boys, Mom?”

Hmm, that actually launched a convoluted chain of thought. I never gave country boys a thought when I was young. I liked grungy musicians, and that was that. I knew there was a variety of hot guys out there, but I preferred pretty boy rockers. Now that I’m not quite so narrow-minded, I have a better appreciation for all kinds of male beauty. I can even appreciate cute yuppies these days when back in the day, I would have been turned off right away by the general look they sported.

I can credit this “enlightenment” to all those free Kindle romance novels I’ve been devouring since I finally decided to give e-readers a try. Fictional heroes come in all forms of hotness — cowboys, SEALs, marines, firefighters, farmers, ranchers, cops, jocks, academics, artists, musicians, chefs, actors, CEOs, ordinary guys, vampires, shifters, demons… even bums! I remember a story where the hero was a homeless guy who actually panhandled. Of course, he actually came from a rich family, but he ran away when he was still a teen and, another of course, he eventually decided to turn his life around.

Anyway, country boys are way up there in the collection of hot heroes I like to read about. Maybe in my dotage (I kid; I’m just pushing 40), I’ve started thinking tractors are sexy. I heard that particular song while in a thrift shop. The lines saying “She thinks my tractor is sexy, it really turns her on” had me chuckling. How dumb! Except I remembered that guy in Aerosmith’s Crazy video, so maybe it’s not that dumb.

Or maybe it is. Maybe that breed only exists in music videos and free Kindle romance novels. Where I grew up and still live in now, I don’t really meet hot tractor-driving country boys. The best this place can do is a cute lawn mowing suburban boy.

So, going back to my daughter’s question, I just said, “I love Daddy. He’s definitely no country boy.”

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