So, I could not even read the whole thing because within the first few paragraphs I realized that all this person wants is to complain. Not once, in all that I read, did it say that “I am trying to put an effort.” It is all about everything and everyone being wrong BUT her. Own up to your self is all I say. I, and most of us, have worked VERY hard to be at a level of “comfort” and for NO ONE, except the lucky ones, did it happen over night. You start from the bottom up and its in your attitude- how you do it is what makes the difference and NOT what you do! I hope you mature some day to know the difference. Good Luck!