surrender

a poem about a loss

dear love

i am so very 
tired.

there is a heaviness 
that has sunken 
deep into the spongy marrow 
of my brittle
bitter bones.

i feel the sap 
from cupid’s arrow
seeping past my 
paper prisons

broken cell walls
that leach my membranes
and memories

as i try 
in vain
to suck your poison
from my veins.

numbness spreads 
throughout my mouth
as i swallow 
my foolishness 
and the foolish mess
of your pride

that they swore 
would always 
cometh before a fall

but they failed 
to tell me
that it wouldn’t be 
into love.

because
i was the one 
who fell face first 
into the spindly nest 
of all your little lines 
of little lies.

oh, spider spin your web

the fly has caught its wings
in your sticky threads

and you wove so many secrets
into the fabric of your truth

that you forgot
to tell me where 
you wove me in as proof

of the rusted nails 
you hammered in 
your hands and feet

as i dangle 
in the mangled tangle 
of your own 
self deceit.

honesty 
was your best policy

but it was never quite 
your practice.

you once had me at hello

but i can only muster now
a wave
of my weary white flag

a tattered sail 
at half mast
mourning 
this morning

the death
that always comes
with goodbye.

to the victor
go the spoils

but all that’s left 
here in the beaten 
breadth of my breast

is an empty treasure chest

and the rotten carcass 
of our love.