The yearn for someone
When I was a kid, ive always wondered why some people already have a relationship at such a young age, it was confusing for me at first but now I think I understand.
I strongly believe that im the kind of person that cant live alone in this world, always missing a piece, empty inside, of course the love for family and friends are different, but to love a special someone is different. Ive always been alone when I was little, around grade school I only had one or two friends, but even they didnt stick around for a while, as I moved on to intermediate level, its a whole other story, everyone was grouped, you either belonged to one or none at all, and I didnt belong anywhere. Highschool is a much more complicated story that even I havent fully grasped, as I grew older I keep coming back to those lonely years, I kept replaying it in my head. They say much about what teenagers know about love is either lust or infatuation, even I got confused by the two. I dont really know how it started, but I had the urge to look for someone special, this was also the time that ive discovered the inner workings of my mind, and got to know myself a little better, then it hit me, im fucking lonely arent I?
As the quest for the special someone goes on, I remembered ever since grade school, no one really had a crush on me, it was fun teasing each other who had a crush on who, it was kind of the highlight of grade school for me, me being the nosy little brat that I am, I knew pretty much everything, I had the upper hand. So what are my chances? A few years pass, I gamble my feelings away, ended up making good and bad decisions altogether, until now, I remain a fool for love, and still a loser.