The Labels we carry
I was honored to be asked back to TEDx Santa Barbara to speak to donors and friends of TED about what my life has been like since I had the opportunity to speak on the red circle. This is the talk I prepared for them.
I wanted to talk about Labels.
Everyone has labels. Sometimes we are born with them, and sometimes we acquire them throughout our lives. I’m chloe, I’m 17 years old, and I’ve gone through a whole lot of labels.
I was born, and I was labelled a “miracle” right off the bat. I wasn’t supposed to be born alive, so the fact i was here on earth in one piece was, as some would say, miraculous. I was quickly then labelled as “different”, which as time went on transformed into the labels “deformed” and “disabled”.
I was born with an incredibly severe clubfoot, one which has cost me many surgeries, doctors appointments, hours in physical therapy, and wheelchair eras. This label of “different” was made easier to bear by the labels my parents deemed best for me to have: “special”. “Loved”. “Unique”. These labels became my identity, and I grew up loving myself and my deformed foot and my growing collection of scars.
But then my labels changed. When I was 14, i was assaulted on my high school campus because of my foot deformity. I was restrained, and my disability was used for someone else’s purposes, in front of the eyes of others, without my consent. I said no, and the perpetrators did not listen. And all of a sudden those labels of “special’, “unique”, and “loved” were ripped away. I was molded and shaped into labels I knew nothing about: “Disgusting”. “Used”. “Freak”. And, when my assault went to court and then trial; “victim”.
I let my labels consume me. And I took on more labels. “Ashamed.” “Depressed.” “isolated”. There was no hope for me, and the girl that had once existed had been rewritten. Her previous labels were gone, never to come back.
But as I began to heal, and slowly gained confidence I realized that only I had the power to determine what my labels were. That I was not trapped, forever to be labelled as “disgusting” “used” “victim”.
A message of self acceptance and love was born, and soon took on the name of Stand Beautiful. And this became my proclamation. I soon took on the labels “determined”. “Brave”. I was called a fighter.
But I needed to do more.
I didn’t have to let my assault win; I could be bigger. Better. Stronger. I applied for my TEDx Talk one night when I was supposed to be doing my homework, and did so without telling my parents. And so I was, for a brief moment, labelled “rebellious”.
Fast forward. After my TED talk. I have new labels. “Speaker”. That label grows to “guest speaker.” “inspirational speaker”. “International speaker.” I become “ambassador.” I become “example”. I become “life-changer” and I again become “miracle”.
So what have I done since that day, there, standing on that infamous Red Circle? I turned 17. Got my driver’s license. Took an AP English exam, and went to prom. But I also spoke at my middle school. And six other middle schools in the area. Three high schools here in santa barbara. And an elementary school in New Delhi, India. I’ve starred in three documentaries. Been in magazines, online articles, podcasts and in the newspaper. This summer I travelled around the world on an international speaking tour, appearing in mobile clubfoot clinics, hospitals, churches, schools, and business meetings throughout central america, africa, and india to spread my stand beautiful message. I’ve gotten the word “beautiful” tattooed over my deformed foot — a new label and a reminder that I am perfect in my imperfections; beautiful just the way i am.
A lot has happened in the 392 days since I was there, in front of an audience, on the TED stage. My message has been heard by thousands and thousands of people across the world, and I’ve discovered a love for words and stories and relationships and people. I don’t yet fully understand how so much good has come out of my assault. My deformity. But I do know that what’s happening right now is way bigger than me. I’m just going to keep saying “yes”, and see where it takes me.
392 days ago, standing up there on that iconic red circle, I was given a new label. A second chance. The power taken from me in my assault was handed right back, only stronger. TED, thank you for enabling me. For labelling me and empowering me.
For calling me resilient.
