Am I friend-able?
What friendship is like post-graduation
I met some extremely kind folks today but after enjoying nice conversation, exchanging instagram handles and heading home, I wondered… Am I friend-able?
While I’m sure there’s a better word for what I’m describing, friendable, a feeling born from a mixture of questions combined neatly into one, will do just fine.
…am I interesting? Do I want to expend energy to get to know new people? Will I be brave enough to jump into social situations to strengthen these friendships? Am I ready? Am I friend-able?
I’m realizing that the close friendships I’ve built have been through shared interests and values but a huge part of it has been due to close proximation. In college it was much easier when the folks you befriended were in a neatly labeled box. But now that the walls of that box have been torn down, it seems like I’m re-figuring out how to build friends and re-understanding what their purpose in my life is.
Since I’m still in the process of figuring out what I enjoy doing and what brings me joy, it seems intimidating to meet someone at one activity (in this case a climbing gym) and then expect me and them to enjoy ourselves in a different activity.
I think part of the fun is trying to figure out what I enjoy doing now that I have more disposable income and a set schedule. Part of the fun is meeting new people who might also enjoy these activities and have shared values with me. Part of the fun is just figuring everything out. And that means, figuring out whether I am friend-able.
Part of me wants to start a substack. I’m really getting tired of Mediums terrible recommendation algo. Seems like my whole feed is filled with writers who want to teach me how to write.
I don’t want that anymore. I just want to see good writing and good stories.
