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I can understand how driven you are to make it . I also have an idea that you are doing just fine businesswise. Aren’t you? I also have a strong suspicion that this article of yours was a result of a sudden attack of self examination , but a temporary one that you will forget in a few days. Maybe you already did. We all tend to develop patterns of behavior and we are all creatures of habits — even if the habits may not be obviously self destructive.

I have lost both my parents in less than one year — this past one , 2015. Mom went totally unexpectedly one year ago , last January. Dad followed this last X-mas , one month ago. That is the genuine point of no return. No second chances , no replays! The finalty of death is absolutely stunning.

I haven’t lived with them for almost 40 years . I did visit , even relatively frequently the past years. I tried my best to make up for all the lost time ; tried to help mom about the house; tried to make amends for the times I hurt them in my then youthful egoism and with the stupid mistakes that caused them endlesss worries and sleepless nights. I phoned often just to hear my mom — it was such a moral support for me , just chatting, her voice only was like a medicine. Now in the past years I fealt that they did not respond well to my attempts at finally manifesting my love and appreciation— it was like they did not care any more. It is not that simple : “now I am ready to make it up to you , so accept it , absolve me of my sins and of my guilt!” . Because it was not the right moment for them any more! I even had the audacity to feel hurt! I just did not feel that unconditional love and caring that I was used to . Now , that hateful hindsight made everything more clear , but just a bit too late. They were done with this life. They were already occupied with what lies ahead of them. That time fimaly did come when I was not anymore their purpose and the center of their universe. I now undestand how the parents feel when children inevitably start spreading their wings and abandoning their parental nest for a life of their own. No matter the amount of love a child receives . It will leave one day. Here the roles were reversed . I watched helplessly how they are turning away and getting ready for their own leap into the unknown. So it was already too late before I actually definitely lost them. I still hurt so bad . As if my arm and leg were amputated. I do not know how long it will last. People say that the acute pain gets less with time. They also say that they never stop missing a lost parent even after the pain is gone.

What I am trying to say , it may sound as a cliché, but still most cliches are based on truth. The most valuable things in life are free . But in this time and age, especially an entrepreneur tends to disregard those things that have no price tag attached . The price and having the money to pay for things becomes the only neasure of success and a source of fullfilment and happines. But that is all a greatest scam of huge proportions. Please never forget that those things which hold the key to your happiness are the love of your parents,of your life partner and of your children if you have any. The things that come for free. If I were you I would write a reminder of this on a big piece of cardboard and hang it somewhere where you will see it every day . Before it is too late.

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