I Am Selfish

Over the years I explored in many different ways what it means to “take care of myself.”

I think I’ve become much better at self-care through experiential knowledge and wisdom, yet I must admit I still struggle with this concept of “being selfish.”

Living in this vibrant city of Los Angeles, I have a tendency to get way too busy, committing to a lot of social, professional, and personal activities, many of which are quite meaningful and enriching to me in my life. Sometimes it’s so hard to say “no,” to invitations and opportunities as I may be afraid of missing something wonderful.

I used to go to a mediation retreat every year between Christmas and New Year. Some friends had asked how I could leave my family during the holidays. Sometimes I feel guilty to get away to my mountain house just so I can have easy access to my beloved forests while I still work remotely. I’ve been told I was selfish, and sometimes I believe it, too.

While this is an ongoing soul searching question, I know one thing. That this mediation practice is absolutely an essential part of my self-care. I am being selfish to carve out this hour in the middle of the day to sit still and breathe just for the sake of sitting and breathing.

Whether you feel selfish or not, I hope you can join me.