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FOMO and priorities

Jaan Kruusma
Jul 27, 2018 · 3 min read

The Fear Of Missing Out. This one is really strong inside me. I want to meet all the people, do all the fun thing, work on all them cool projects, spend as much as time possible with friends and family, meditate, exercise, everything now.

I wanted to write this down for myself in the hope of understanding the underlying reason for it, and hopefully get a conscious understanding about what do I need to change in order to be less FOMO.

Let’s start with people — I really do like everyone because I tend to have a habit of seeking out the best of everyone, maybe that’s why people like me. I rather focus my energy in understanding than judging. This makes everyone cool in their own way and I think about everyone as equal, but give the limited resource of time I need to start making decisions in how and with whom we spend that time with.

I have managed to put together some kind of priority list so in case of a decision I will use that for reference. So guess what is number 1 on the list. Me, myself and I — this might sound selfish and it is. I have realized that if I am not truly happy or aligned with the situation then I am just a crappy crowd in that situation. Better to remove yourself, sit down and figure out what you really want before you start to fill other peoples needs and wishes.

Second comes the family — if I would have my own family, this will come first, but currently this means my sisters, my mother, grand parents, cousins and close relatives. I believe and feel that the more you spend time taking care of your roots then the more benefit you get long term. The stronger roots you have the higher and stronger you can go.

After family comes friends. This has been probably the most confusing for me, but now I see and feel the people who are more close to my values, with whom I have shared a common history, gone through the good and the bad times, specially the bad times I feel build much stronger connections than the good. This is work in progress, but I think and believe that I am moving in the right direction.

I used to put work first in a lot of times in my life, thinking that this would solve bigger problems, but actually has been one reason I have failed in some of my relationships. For me it gets super confusing because I am self employed and sometimes I mix up my personal needs with my need to be successful in my work life. But to be honest, true friends don’t really care what your profession is or how famous you are. Of course they are happy if you are doing well, but being friends is not related to that.

Last comes entertainment. I have had a super life for 30 years filled with parties, games, good people, lot’s of movies and TV series downloaded, fun times in college, fun times with business and a lot of freedom to do what I want. Today I feel that this is the part of my life that comes last and use my time more wisely. If I need to choose between entertainment and everything mentioned above, then I will always choose the latter. Or I just mix it up with other activities.

This will probably evolve as I grow, but currently this seems a good way to go. All suggestions and examples are super welcome, I actually insist that if you have any good ideas related to FOMO, prioritizing and making decisions, than please please share.

Thank you for being you.
Be happy!

Jaan Kruusma

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The plan is to stick to the plan , if the plan changes then be happy— Simple meditations about life and technology.

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