Why the World Needs More Working Mothers
I’m in the final days of maternity leave with my second daughter, and I’ll admit, it’s tempting to run for the hills. I have a high-pressure career at one of the country’s top communications agencies, and work/life balance has never come easy for me. Returning to work after months away, secluded in my own home with my baby attached to my hip, unsure of what day it is or where the hours go, can be daunting to say the least.
But if I learned anything after my first maternity leave, it’s that the world needs more of us. Society — including little girls and boys, and young, impressionable adults — needs more of us. Here’s why.
Aside from the schedule changes, breastfeeding commitment, and my house being a complete disaster 24/7, the biggest change for me following my entry to working motherhood was my world view. Being back in that familiar workspace — with a drastically different outlook — made me realize just how much I now differed from many of my coworkers. And that’s a good thing.
Don’t get me wrong — the world needs more women in leadership, period. Especially now more than ever. But having been through the life-changing experience of becoming a mom, I realized just how valuable mothers are in the business world, and how there truly aren’t enough of them.
Recently on one of the mom groups I belong to, I saw a mom post about not being able to decide if she should go back to work. They could afford her staying home, but she loved her job — just felt guilty. I identified with this so much.
And though I wanted to chime in with encouragement, I quickly noticed that all of the comments from other moms shared the same advice: stay home. You’ll never get this time back. It’s worth it.
Of course, this is a highly personal decision. And at times, being a stay-at-home mom can arguably be harder than being a working one. But seeing all of those comments made me sad. I can’t be the only one that sees the value on the other side of the coin…can I?
Yes, there are days when I think about staying home. When I feel guilty about my toddler spending more hours at daycare than her own house, or me not being there to see all of her achievements that day — whether a successful trip to the potty or the sparkly craft she made. Especially now, as I prepare to put my second daughter into daycare for the first time at four months old, I feel guiltier than ever.
But I also feel determined. Not just for me and my own success, but for my daughters. They deserve a world where women don’t have to prove themselves twice as hard as any man; where women aren’t ashamed to stand up to sexual harassment; where women who have babies don’t instantly feel cornered into staying home or need to explain their every move at the office. And the only way society is going to continue to improve its treatment of working mothers is if more women do it.
Because after becoming a mom, I’d go so far to say that a leader who is also a mother is more level-headed. She knows what a true life or death crisis looks like, and most times it’s not in the office.
She is compassionate. Like a mother hen, she looks out for her teammates and is someone you want to work for.
And she is tough as nails. Because growing and bringing another human into this world is physically and mentally one of the toughest challenges there is.
It’s truly impossible to understand the full scale of what becoming a mom includes — the daily balancing of priorities; the self-induced guilt trips; the late nights and early mornings — before you experience it. I know, because I used to think I did.
As more millennials enter parenthood than ever before, there’s never been a more important time to be a working mother. Because the only people who are going to make the workplace more conducive to working motherhood — whether it be flexible hours, remote workdays or a proper mother’s room — are other working moms. Women aren’t going to stop having babies any time soon. And smart women with established careers shouldn’t feel like they have to choose between their life’s work and the life they brought into this world.
So as I return back to work for the second time, I feel proud — proud to set an example of an ambitious, accomplished woman for my daughters, my coworkers and friends. That doesn’t mean it won’t be hard. And it doesn’t mean I won’t have bad days —or loads of guilt — because I know I will. But I will do so with my head held high, and the comfort of knowing that I’m paving the way for other moms to come.
If you, too, are getting ready to return to work, excited to continue pursuing your career but riddled with guilt, know this: yes, you can. You can draw boundaries to keep your family life intact. You can be more productive during the workday to make it home by dinnertime. And you can be confident in your own value and ask your employer for more — whether it’s pay, flexible hours or PTO.
Maybe one day, your kids will thank you for giving them an example of a strong, smart woman who loves them just as fiercely as she knows her own worth.
