I AM WHO I PRESENT MYSELF

“I am who I present myself to be at any given moment.”

I have known this quote for quite some time, but it just occurred to me how it’s been playing in my life.

It brings to mind the play that I had often viewed as problematic.

Why?

Perhaps it was in the idealistic structured mind of my youth that presupposed that as I moved into maturity that the adult me would materialize. That identity, then, would be a constant for the rest of my life.

Sort of akin to say, a local character of some small town that everyone knew would be consistent in personality and existence no matter the season nor year. One whose mannerisms, quips and such were as predictable as the phases of the moon.

I never did.

I never have.

And now being in my sixth decade of travels around the sun… never will.

Instead, I’ve always flowed. Rather than being defective, I was simply fluid. And that’s natural; that’s free.

I read books, lots and lots of books, and watched and listened and paid attention.

And plenty of people then, and PLENTY of people today are all too eager to tell you how to construct that permanent-grown-up-you, and don’t mind charging big bucks for it.

Used to you could take a walk around a Barnes & Noble or Books A Million and the self-help section was the biggest in the whole store.

Nowadays we can add online availabilities, programs, and e-courses to the brick and mortar bookstores.

Ahem, in my experience, and as another quote that’s crossed my line of sight alludes, there comes a time when you throw-out all of the books and bullshit and just exist as you are.

As you arrived.

Just each breath.

~ Jackson