How Do Narcissists Destroy Their Own Relationships? A Firsthand Account From an Aspiring Hustler.
Narcissists. They’re a tricky bunch, aren’t they? You can love them, or you can hate them, but there’s no denying that they can cause incredible damage to relationships they’re involved in. I’m a 27 year old software engineer, creative director, and part-time actor. And I’m part narcissist. So I’m uniquely qualified to tell you exactly how narcissistic behavior ruins relationships.
I don’t consider myself a real narcissist. I just display some narcissistic traits from time to time. But those traits have a tendency to crop up in my relationships, and more often than not, I’ve seen them tear apart what could have been something special. It’s been heartbreaking, but it’s also taught me a lot about how these behaviors can ruin relationships.
1. Thinking It’s All About you
Narcissists are great at making it seem like they’re the center of the universe. They’ll make sweeping statements and generalizations that leave no room for anyone else’s opinion, while simultaneously dismissing those of the other person. This type of behavior leaves the other person feeling frustrated, unheard, and taken for granted — all of which can quickly lead to the downfall of the relationship.
Whenever I find myself getting too narcissistic, I make sure to take a step back and take the other person’s perspective into account. It can be easy to forget about them in the heat of the moment, so being intentional about making sure that their opinion is heard and valued can go a long way in maintaining a healthy relationship.
2. Putting the Other Person on A Pedestal
Another way that narcissists can ruin relationships is by idolizing the other person. Instead of seeing them as an equal partner, the narcissist will put them on a pedestal and make them out to be superior or perfect in some way. This can lead to an unbalanced power dynamic that can unintentionally stifle communication and breed resentment.
My advice is to keep both partners on the same level. Communication should be elevated not just to discuss the important topics, but also to establish mutual respect between both sides. This will help create a sense of equality and a healthy balance in the relationship.
3. Refusing to Deal with Conflict
When problems arise in a relationship, it’s essential to talk them out in an adult and respectful way. Narcissists, however, tend to run away from confrontation, as they don’t want to risk being proven wrong or losing the argument. This only serves to make the other person feel unheard, and it gives them a chance to bottle up their feelings, which can manifest as resentment.
It’s important to remember that it’s ok to disagree about things. Being able to discuss disagreements and express your own opinion without fear of judgment is key to a healthy relationship. If a conflict arises, it’s best to talk it out together, and come to a resolution that both of you can agree on.
Conclusion
Narcissism isn’t a good trait to have, but we all have a bit of it in us. The important thing is to recognize it, and to be aware of the effect it can have on our relationships. By recognizing our narcissistic tendencies and working to overcome them, we can create healthier and more fulfilling relationships with those around us.
If you need a bit of extra help in improving your relationships, wireless noise-canceling headphones can be a great solution to get in the zone and focus on improving communication.
For more tips on how to be better in your relationships, check out these blog posts.
