OPTIMISTIC NIHILISM
nothing matters, and that’s ok.
For my entire life, no question has stuck with me as long or weighed me down as much as:
“What’s the point of life?”
I’ve tried to find an answer so fucking hard. I‘ve looked everywhere:
Religion, ancient Greek philosophies, meditation, the stubborn pursuit of my goals, love, and friendship.
I couldn’t find it.
So, I turned to nihilism, the belief in nothing. Nothing mattered. There was no god, no higher power. We were born into emptiness, just to die and fade into non-existence. To be forgotten. Nothing had a reason.
In a way, that was a relief. No longer did I have to desperately search for a meaning, because there was none.
But it also made everything worth living for pointless.
Why even bother? What’s the point?
Life became tiring. It felt like I dragged my feet across a muddy path without even knowing why I was walking. I could’ve as well just sat on the ground, doing nothing.
But insignificance doesn’t have to be depressing. It doesn’t have to press you into inactivity and motionlessness.
Ultimately, the insignificance of life liberated me.
It allowed me to define my own purpose, set my own goals, and live after my own values.
There’s no higher being, telling me how to live my life. There’s nobody showing me what an ideal life would look like.
Instead, no matter how I would choose to live my life, it would be ideal.
Optimistic nihilism is what they call it.
“The ability of a person to create their own meaning after fully accepting that the universe is a large place of meaninglessness.”
I would call it — starting life with an empty page. A blank canvas that can be painted on by only oneself.
No constraints.
Living life on your own terms.
After all, “nothing matters” just means that nothing has to matter if you don’t want it to.
Simultaneously, everything matters.
It’s up to you to decide.
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