Venting

Wow! 2016 is really taking off for me. Barely four weeks in and I am already being pushed to my limit. I am taking 18 units this semester (max for Cerritos College and I am aiming for a 4.0), soon to be working two jobs (being a chef and a tutor with a ton of paperwork to take care of; *side note: the paperwork might actually literally weigh a ton due to the immense number I have to fill out and mail every month), doing independent research and learning from mentors on how to live a healthier lifestyle (not necessarily eating vegan but i am quitting shampoo and looking for alternatives; also includes the establishment of a morning routine and a nightly routine as I read from two articles by Benjamin Hardy: link 1 and link 2; and getting swoll), and fighting with an old friend who goes by the name Depression (just so happens to conveniently come back to me at the perfect time possible); ALL this while pursuing my personal dreams and goals, and balancing family time and social life.

I am SO exhausted after just two weeks… I actually had to go out and buy a planner to keep track of all the things I have to do. I used to just keep a mental reminder but these past 3 weeks, I have been faced with so many appointments and responsibilites that I have to constantly adjust my plans. I didn’t want to risk forgetting something because there’s just no room for any careless mistakes. I also bought a file folder to keep all the paperwork for tutoring organized. I used to just stack all my papers in one pile and go through them when I need something but I really need to be on top of my ish for this job.

I really feel good about the lifestyle change. Though it can be really stressful at times, it is also more rewarding so it makes all the hard work worth it. Researching all the alternatives I could use to replace shampoo is a big hastle and sometimes I am skeptical of the things I find, (egg and lemon with olive oil like what the eff?) but the results I get makes me feel great. I tried the lemon mixed with olive oil and water and my scalp felt so clean afterwards. I felt all the grease and dryness of my scalp go away, something that shampoo and conditioner couldn’t do for more than a couple of hours at the most. But with the lemon solution, the feeling lasted for 3 days. It was a comforting feeling not having that itch to scratch my scalp every ten minutes.

The only thing I really am struggling with is setting up my morning and nightly routines. It is tough for me to get up early in the morning almost as tough as it is for me to sleep before twelve midnight. I would usually stretch, workout, meditate and then eat in the mornings but that has been disrupted when the semester started. I am taking morning classes from Monday thru Thursday and I cant wake up early enough to do my usual routine. It will be a real challenge to pick it back up again but I feel a nightly routine would really help out my morning routine. The trouble comes with my inconsistent sleeping pattern. There are nights where I would sleep at 3 in the morning which means I wouldnt wake up until at least 8am, if that. Developing a nightly routine would give me the peace of mind to sleep soundly at a designated time and it would also give me the discipline to really plan out my days by the hour. A big part of why I sleep so late is because I feel I dont get enough done and with the amount of units I am taking this semester, it would be even worse. I’d actually have to plan my whole, entire week by the hour if I want to really get these routines going and I think that it would be a bigger challenge than getting a 4.0 this semester.

Speaking of the semester, I am teetering between keeping my French class or dropping it. Keeping it would mean that I would have more options as to which college I want to transfer to. I also think it would be really cool to be trilingual. Its actually a goal of mine to be quadlingual by learning Spanish and French (I already know English and Tagalog). But with how much my aunt talks about how Asia is the future, I might possibly take up learning an Asian language (Chinese, Korean, or Japanese). However, this is not my main focus right now. I hate to put it off because it takes years to become fluent in a language and I really wanna walk around like a BAWS and switch off between languages in a social event just to look and sound like a really cool, important guy. Maybe I’ll just save that idea for a character in a play/novel (noted).

On the other hand, dropping my French class would mean that my Tuesday and Thursday mornings would be free. This would give me more leeway to develop my morning and nightly routines. It would also give me less to stress about in terms of school, and it would give me more time to focus on other classes. Juggling two jobs would also be easier especially with the amount of paperwork that I’ll have to deal with for tutoring. I’ll also be able to focus more time into writing not just for my Advanced Creative Writing Portfolio class but for my side projects as well.

Anyways, I think I’ve vented long enough. I know that I skipped over the part about my depression, family, and social life. These topics really deserve their own separate posts. For those of you who actually stayed and read up to this point, I’d like to thank you. It might not seem like a lot but for an aspiring writer like myself, keeping my readers interested is a big deal so again THANK YOU!! May you all be blessed for many moons. Until next time. Au revoir.