Why I’m Not Going to Work Today

Anyone who knows me, or follows me on Snapchat is aware that I spend about 98% of my time working at the Starbucks inside of Boston University’s Questrom School of Business, and roughly 2% of my time actually in class. But I did not take off from work today because I need to focus on finding a real job, or to study the 150+ Supreme Court decisions that I need to have memorized by Tuesday. I took off because frankly, I’m tired of making Unicorn Frappuccinos for my peers, who — let me remind you — are supposed to be, “leaders who create value for the world and shape the business landscape.” Well, I can assure you that posting Instagrams of your Unicorn Frap is not going to create any value for anyone.

According to Starbucks, the Unicorn Frap is, “as rare as a unicorn.” I beg to differ, because nearly every other drink that has been ordered for the last two days has been a Unicorn Frap. To give this rant more context, we are the busiest Starbucks in Massachusetts, and serve 2,500 customers a day. That’s a lot of Unicorn Fraps.

I know several baristas have already taken to Twitter to express their anger. I’ve been sent this and tagged in this repeatedly, but I hope you can understand my frustration. I’m not surprised that the Unicorn Frap has gone viral on Instagram, or that it has it’s own Snapchat filter. It’s pink and blue and covered in fucking glitter, of course it’s a social media sensation. #UnicornFrappuccino is every basic biddie’s dream come true. But come on Questrom students, I thought you were better than that. You’re supposed to be snakes, not unicorns. Right?

This post does not represent the opinions of Boston University or Starbucks Corporation.

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