Does something as superficial as skin color make someone more or less entitled to feel pain about a loss of life? You want special treatment from your coworkers because you look more like someone who was killed than they do. I think that those who did not perpetrate the act are no more obligated to say something about it than you are obligated to feel upset. This notion of collective pain seems so superficial to those who don’t feel it. And how could they understand it? The way you put it, it’s so irrational.
When you preface every thought with statements like, “My boss, who is white…” you seem obsessed with race. You seem like you think the race of a person is the sole determinant of their entire disposition in life. It almost completely invalidates the experience of these individuals.