My dear old dad.. ..

Here is another one from my past. My father died when I was in my 20’s. He passed away in a hospital in Arizona if memory serves. He body was ravaged by cancer. The nurse at the Veterans hospital told me that I shouldn’t come down there as I wouldn’t recognize him from the surgeries they did.

So I didn’t.

The last time I saw him was when I was 18 years old as he rode off on his bicycle. As he rode off down John R. He was telling me that I was never going to amount to anything.

As I stood there in Pizza Connections parking lot waiting for the deliveries I was about to take. I thought to myself. You will see.

Well he never did save for a letter I wrote him… a 3 years after he passed I wrote this piece here. I don’t know where the letter I wrote him went. But in short it said I forgave him in spite of himself and how behaved and that I did go on to become something..

Things my father taught me but never knew it — 8/7/2000

You know sometimes in life you get the oddest opportunities to change who and how you are going to react to what life deals you. ..

Here are the things my father taught me….

He taught me that work is important to get the internal dignity that you want….

He taught me that you have to communicate (talk) to your spouse to get the thoughts across and come to an understanding…

He taught me that all things I say can cause harm to others…

He taught me that people are easily hurt by careless and selfish acts.

He taught me that you can only get respect if you have earned it.

He taught me that trust is something everyone deserves some of.

He taught me that you are who you wish to become.

He taught me that every action has a direct consequence ..even if delayed.

He taught me that settling in a relationship is not what you want to do.

He taught me that children bring miracles to you ..even if you don’t know it…

He taught me that gambling is A HORRIBLE thing when done in excess.

He taught me that it is VERY VERY VERY important to be there when others depend on you.

He taught me that you have so .. so much influence on the ones that are close to you….that you should wield that with the greatest care…

He taught me that you can succeed in adverse conditions …

He taught me that without your health you have nothing…

For you see my father had a mental illness and it took me 10 years to understand and forgive him of it… and it is funny that when I look back … through his abuse and the pain..that without him knowing he taught me all of the good things a father should… kinda odd eh??