My opinion should be taken with a grain of salt — what do I know? My experiences are irrelevant mostly, they’re white.

BUT — there was a period in my life where everything I knew was uprooted, changed, and the rose colored glasses I had on were smashed and replaced with an entirely new experience.

I went from being one of the 80% to one of the 5–10%, literally. I was young and admittedly scared to death. I kept my head down and tried to hide, though I stood out. But ultimately I wasn’t bothered, and I opened up over time. I made some friends, it was comprised mostly of “misfits”, guys who didn’t fit into any of the other groups for whatever reason. The black kids who befriended me were ruthlessly mocked, taunted, abused in some form or fashion.

That was the year I learned about the “shades of black” and how there is a shit ton of pressure from every damn side of the spectrum. I can’t fathom to know how pervading this is or how this effects anyone. I can just remember how torn my friends were in those moments, how difficult it was for them. While I, the shy, extremely white kid, was left alone.

I moved from there, back to where I originally came from, and my black friends here didn’t have that same pressure — at least not as much or to the same degree. So our friendship has lasted without the same kind of impediments, and for all of those experiences I’m thankful.