Tips for Going “No Contact” with a Toxic Parent

The positives and pitfalls of cutting communication with a toxic parent from the scapegoat child of a narcissist parent.

So, you’ve decided to go “no contact” with a toxic parent. Congratulations! Maybe you’re exhausted from the angry messages, controlling behavior, and stalking. Maybe your own child is being subjected to the abuse you received. Whatever the reason, this is a pivotal moment where you stop accepting abuse, and draw a healthy boundary to protect yourself.

WHAT IS “NO CONTACT”?

There are several techniques for dealing with toxic parents. You may cycle through all three. Each method is challenging and takes practice.

• Gray Rock — Still in contact with toxic parents, but interactions are impersonal. Hello/Goodbye, no details about your life. Neutral/bland.
• Low Contact — Rare contact with toxic parents. Maybe you interact, see or speak to them a few times per year.
• No Contact —No contact with your toxic parents. You don’t interact, see or speak to them at all. This could last for a year, or the rest of your life.

WHAT ARE TOXIC PARENTS?

Toxic parents aren’t parents. They’re abusers in parent clothing (technically, it’s their behaviors that are…