Why Birth Control is ruining my Sex Life

Photo by Anter Blackbird on Unsplash

As you may know, most days I counsel young women on the perks of birth control. Lighter periods, shorter periods, flawless skin, I mean c’mon which woman doesn’t want that? Plus the added bonus of so many different options. There are birth control methods to fit every kind of lifestyle. Can I let you in on little secret friends?

I’m not on birth control …. And this scares me to death.

Let me say I love my daughter, I really do. She brings joy to my life but I’m not trying to have any more kids. Like NONE.

“Then why aren’t you on birth control you ask?”

I know, I know, this is not what you’d expect but I really do have a good explanation.

“Before child” was born I was on a combination pill (estrogen and progesterone) for years. I take medication diligently so I reaped the benefits regular periods and clear skin.

After giving birth, I was on the “mini pill’ since I was breastfeeding and wanted to maintain my milk supply. I started getting piercing headaches where I was popping ibuprofen on a daily basis. I checked my blood pressure and it was through the roof!

I had experienced elevated blood pressure while on the pill once before so this was familiar territory for me. Because my headaches were excruciating I stopped taking the pills that day. I wasn’t willing to endure another day of pain.

“Why not just pick another form of birth control ?”

To be honest, I’m too scared to get an IUD (plus my secret fear that I will develop bacterial vaginas-an overgrowth of bacteria in the vagina that makes you smell really funky.).

I don’t like the bleeding profile of the Nexplanon. Although the research states only 1 out of 4 women will have more bleeding, I’m convinced I would be that woman.

I’m not sold on Depo Provera. I’m also convinced I will gain weight.

Photo by London Scout on Unsplash

So my choices are abstinence or condoms. Although I seriously contemplated getting a diaphragm. I don’t think doctors even offer them anymore. If you know any that do let me know! Since I’m married, abstinence was vetoed instantly (LOL).

My husband and I decided to go the condom route (a little TMI, I know). It has worked out for us so far but no method is 100% effective. The thought of “accidentally” becoming pregnant has me petrified. So I unintentionally avoid sex. I’ve had some time to think about it, and I’m contemplating a “permanent birth control solution.” There are a couple of options available so I need to pick one and schedule an appointment.

I’ve never had dreams of having a large family. I’m asked every day if I’m going to have another baby and I keep giving them the same answer… NO!

Please don’t think I made this decision on my own. My husband tells me repeatedly that he is happy with life as the “Three King” and in the end, that’s all that matters.

Share your thoughts. Do you have the “birth control blues”? How did you decide on your current method? Are any of you a family of three? How did you come to that decision?