Dear So-Called New Guy: So It’s The Military’s Fault? ~ Presidenting Is Hard Edition

Memo to the So-Called New Guy: Yes, presidenting is hard.

And now you’ve decided to blame the military ² as well as President Obama for the failed raid in Yemen which killed a Navy SEAL along with numerous others. The SEAL’s parents refused to meet with you when their son arrived home, and rightfully so. I’m not sure I could have held my tongue if one of my sons died because of a raid you ordered, but perhaps their choice left a greater impact on you. But then we’ll never know that.

I guess calling you the commander-in-chief doesn’t exactly fit. You authorized the raid but couldn’t be bothered to go to the Situation Room while it happened, preferring instead to bother people on Twitter. Yes, that’s what a small minority of voters did to all of us. They elected you as our so-called president, an overgrown man-child lacking any impulse control. Fabulous.

During the campaign, you stated that you love war. Really? You received five deferments so that you didn’t have to go to Vietnam, so how do you know? I mean a bone spur can be painful. And didn’t we all hear that you told Howard Stern that sleeping around and contracting sexually transmitted diseases was your personal Vietnam?¹ You really believe that’s a fair comparison? You demean every soldier’s experience with that comment.

When we taught karate, we had a student who had been a combat medic in Vietnam. He and my husband bonded over shared experiences and he was a lovely man. But he also suffered from PTSD from his experiences over there. He would wake up after a recurring nightmare wiping his buddy’s shattered skull and brains off of his hands and face. This went on for years. But STDs are inconvenient, aren’t they?

So I suppose it stands to reason that you’d be tweeting instead of monitoring the raid in Yemen. And you shouldn’t try to speak to the parents of Chief Petty Officer William “Ryan” Owens anymore. Leave them to their insurmountable grief and to those who actually care about what happened to them. And if I were you, I’d stop blaming the military when it’s customary for the commander-in-chief to accept full responsibility for the military actions he authorizes. It’s part of that surreal job you’re supposed to be doing.

Our military doesn’t have to like its commander-in-chief. But it does help if they can stomach following that individual’s orders. How will that be possible now that you’ve taken the coward’s way out by blaming the military for the failed raid? Our military will no doubt behave professionally, but to throw them under the bus for a decision that was deemed risky at best is shameful. What’s wrong with you?

My husband and I just returned from the VA Hospital in Portland where he had another dental appointment. He’s getting an upper denture and it’s been six months since the process began and he’s not done yet. Only one staff member was behind the desk in the office to help veterans which is tough when the check-in kiosks don’t work. They do a great job there but they need money with which to operate. Fund them.

He saw his primary care doctor last week at the local VA clinic but they were short-staffed as well. It’s an ongoing struggle for them to take care of veterans properly without the funding they need. We’ve seen what happens when my husband seeks care locally. No one wants to accept the fee schedule the VA allows. So the veteran either pays out of pocket or s/he waits to be seen by a VA clinic. If the GOP has its way and veterans’ care is privatized, it will be disastrous for them.

It takes a certain strength of character to be a president. It’s clear that you don’t have that. You should have stayed running your businesses and playing with your Russian friends and not upset everyone so. But that’s not what happened and here we are with letter number two. The presidenting is hard edition.

Pucker up, buttercup. It’s only just begun.


The Crone in Residence


Originally published at on February 28, 2017.