Control Is Deceptive

I have a confession. I’m afraid of flying. I don’t like airplanes. I fly about once a month, but yet I can’t shake the feeling. And I know why I’m afraid to fly. Don’t tell me that flying is statistically safer than driving.

With my mechanical engineer side, I think about everything that has to go right to fly. From the combustion of highly compressed fuel and air to the mechanical systems that control the flaps to give you the right stability, there’s a lot of things that have to go right.

But I’m afraid of flying because I have no control over these things. I certainly don’t have control over gravity. I find my fear foolish yet I’m unable to get over it…not being in control that is.

Maybe you’re like me where you want to control as many of the variables you have in your life. Maybe you’re working hard to save money. Maybe you’re addicted to planning. Or maybe you like doing things solo. Whatever it is, just be reminded that control ≠ peace of mind. It feels like it would, but it doesn’t in the end. It’s because you can’t control outcomes.

There are only two things you can control: attitude and effort. Attitude is the pursuit of excellence, your response to circumstances, your commitment to learning, and the depth of your focus. Effort is your grit, your unwillingness to give up, your discipline and your level of intensity.

The rest…the outcome…it’s out of your control.

So here’s to flying and letting go of the things you cannot control.

This article originally appeared at