Unfriend = More Time + Early Retirement
There’s a friend of mine who really liked me, when we were working together. He still works there, and I do not. Thus, we don’t see each other as often anymore.
The thing between me and him was that we loved pulling each other’s legs, sometimes going overboard.
Since we cannot meet up like we used to do. We talk on the phone every 2–3 days. We throw some stupid jokes and laugh.
Key here is every 2–3 days.
Let me get some facts straight before anything.
- I don’t call. He does.
- I like, actually love, to joke with my male friends.
But, it was too much.
It was starting to get on my nerve.
It quite often distracted my workflow.
One time, he left a few calls. I thought he was up to something with me. So, I called.
“What’s up?, I said.
“!@$#!%%”, he started to say some meaningless shit and tried to goof around with me.
“Seriously, why did you call this many times?”, I asked him with a serious tone.
“Dunno.”, he replied back to me in a lazy way.
I got real serious, and told him, “Hey man, I seriously appreciate that you want to keep in touch with me. And, I like you and also love to share some shit for fun. But, don’t do this anymore. It’s too much.”
“OK, bro.”, my ex-coworker seemed to have received my message.
After a few days later, he calls me up and start to fuck around with me, again. He didn’t understand what I had said.
I hung up.
I unfriended him.
I deleted his number.
I blocked his messages and calls.
This kind of stuff might be petty. And, yes, it is. It’s not that big of a deal.
But, the smalls add up, compound, and grow out of hand really quick, if we don’t do anything about it.
Before that happens, I always cut it out. And, I did that again this time.
Let me be clear, by the way.
It wasn’t done out of anger or anything.
To be perfectly honest, It was a very controlled act that came from my personal philosophy.
What is my personal philosophy?
‘Minimalism’ in one word. And, I apply this way of living to the social context, as well.
Minimalism doesn’t mean ‘passive no-addition’. It’s actually about ‘proactive subtraction’.
It means proactively taking out on a regular basis rather than letting it be without adding anything in a passive manner. Whether physical stuff or social connections.
Of course, minimalism is about saying no to the urge of buying a fancy watch or brand-new iPhone.
But, it also means saying NO with bravery and without shame to the friends who bug us with the regular requests, like going out and drinking all night together.
When I look at my families and friends, I feel sorry for them seriously.
There are just too many weddings, funerals, meet ups, reunions, holidays, and other social obligations to catch up with all the fucking time.
More importantly, with the people that they don’t care about.
And they go on to complain about not having enough money to save in their retirement accounts. They complain about not having enough time to exercise or do what they enjoy.
Oh, by the way the things that I just mentioned, like exercise, saving, and doing what we enjoy, are the MOST important things. Period. Hands down.
And we miss out because of all the social obligations that are traditionally accepted into our lives.
Some years ago, I dug my heels in and made up my mind to ditch the whole scene. More time and money available. What can I want more?
It deeply saddens me that a majority of the people live this way, not taking care of themselves, first.
Don’t make me sad.
And wake up, folks!
Let’s get this squared away.
It’s time to unfriend some.
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[If you loved this one, you would love another writing of mine. Check that out by clicking here: I am a Jerk. I Don’t Go to Any Weddings.]
