‘Good Lord, is that the text already?

Solutions desperately seeking a problem

Call me a cynic, but I sometimes think the Mother of Invention has lost control of her charges.

Innovation, inspiration and problem-solving is key to discovering potential solutions to the intractable issues the world faces to day.

So why the heck are we coming up with so many solutions that are so clearly in desperate need of a problem?

I’m as much for natty and clever ideas as the next man, whether in FinTech, or in fabric technology, or in waste reduction and sustainability.

But I’ll take a medical advance that stands a chance of eradicating a life-threatening disease, or a means of providing clean water, or portable homes and shelters to those that need them, or simply water, over another app any day of the week.

So as a means of poking some fun, and of venting my spleen but with a point (I think), here is a totally subjective review of my top ‘solutions begging for a problem’ we could do without.

Apple Watch (any smart watch, actually)

I mean, really, how much time do we waste checking devices, and is it sooo much one really needs it on your wrist?

The speaking till

Yes, on a shop counter, a till that speaks to the shop-keep. Annoying, irrelevant, and demeaning to those who have to listen to it…what life-advantage does this bring? None.

Controlling your heating, lights and so on from your phone.

Am I alone in wondering what was so terribly inefficient about timers on plugs and on boilers? Do you really need this convenience? No.
Intelligent white goods. Let’s forget intelligent, food-ordering fridges and focus on intelligent, food-ordering adults.

Apps that tell you when to drink water.

There is a system honed over years of civilisation for this. It’s called being thirsty. Or sensible.

Apps that tell you when to stand up.

Look, I know posture is important – I get up and walk around a lot because my back has the flexibility of an iron girder. But what next? An app that tells you to withdraw your hand from boiling water, fire and the BBQ?

Apps that tell you when to sit down.

See above.

3D television.

Yeah. That really caught on, didn’t it?

There’s already a 3D world out there. Go out and find it, fercrissakes!

Self-tying laces.

Great in that movie. Nowhere else.

There. I feel better already.

What have I missed? Do share, comment and follow me on @jayrhenley for marketing and social and digital stuff, architecture, art, music and rants. But not necessarily in that order.

Message ends.