Chasing Acceptance or Love?
Which one holds the power?
This has been on my heart the past couple of days. I recently had just ended a long off again on again relationship. I am choosing to be vulnerable with all of you because I’m in this place where I want to get myself out of the way and to share testimonies that could be helpful and encouraging to others. This life I am living is not my own. So here we go.
I never really understood this ‘relationship’ when we had started talking. But, I realized that later on that it wasn’t love that I was receiving from the relationship. It was acceptance. I was looking for him to accept me. I was allowing him to have an opinion of my worth.
When I hit the season of identity (a few months ago) I realized that I have been carrying the fear of man with me for years. I have allowed peoples’ opinions of me to try and define who I am as a person. It sounds crazy, right? I really wanted to be accepted by certain people. It makes you “feel good” when someone notices you, that you look up to or you think is important. We’ve all been there at some point in our lives.
So when I looked up the meaning of the word ‘acceptance’ I found out that it is a word that also means ‘welcoming’ in many different languages. Who wouldn’t want to be welcomed? But, acceptance also means the obvious to ‘ undertake something being offered’. Wow. When you look at it that way. You realize that it becomes a man vs. spirit situation. What can we offer to people that will ever be good enough? That’s the question of infinite possibilities especially in society today. We keep trying to change either for others. Whether you are changing for a job, for a loved one, for a friend, for social media, for etc.
Acceptance is lined with judgment; which then leads to fear of man. If we are casting judgment, aren’t we playing God? What standards has a certain person reached? Are they valuable? I know at this point of my identity season. I have realized that I am done being a people pleaser and am now about being pleased with who I am. I want to be in a place where I am so in love with myself because I have been focusing on making myself more and more like Christ.
If we chase after love then we are going to see better results, not only in the physical but also in the spiritual realm. Love conquers all, it surpasses beyond what acceptance could. God even tells us that love surpasses all understanding. “To know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge — that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.” — Ephesians 3:19
“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” — 1 Corinthians 13:4–7
There it is!
So chase LOVE.
Because who wouldn’t want to roam freely in the presence of love rather than chasing acceptance from fear of man?