You’re right. Bystanders should always stand by the victim of assault. What they need in that moment is allies, to let them know that their feelings are valid. Thanks for the reminder. It will bolster my resolve next time I have to intervene.

There could be more to your experience, though. There’s actually a subset of people who think spanking is an acceptable form of intercourse. That “correcting” another person, usually a woman, is reasonable behavior. That person might have believed that, contrary to harassing you, he was acting appropriately. I don’t think so, but he might. Check it out here:

http://greencomet.org/2013/06/21/spanking-for-love/