Mushroom trips are strange, obviously, but the dreams you have afterwards are strange, too. I dreamt a man took my cigarettes and smoked them for me, and the next day my cough was gone. I dreamt of dead relatives, recently gone. During the trip I saw blue and gold horses and I laughed and jumped around a lot. I’d made myself a little tea after biting a big cap off a stem and getting the bits stuck in my teeth.

When I woke up, I felt great of course. Everything took its proper place in the universe. I remembered this time that someone hated my guts and told me so about a year ago. I tried to feel anything for it and couldn’t. This is what your problems now will be like then. It helped.

I also remembered a time that I was in high school. I tried out for the talent show. 15 kids tried out. I got rejected, which I was okay with, because it absolved me of actually having to do the thing. Then, when the time came to watch the talent show, I realized the other 14 kids had all been given a spot. Why did my brain remind me of this? Did it even happen the way I remember it? Feels very real now, at least. Has this been festering in the back of my mind for literally half of my life? I remember when it happened I felt like I didn’t care, but maybe I did? Very strange, these fungi.

I feel like a grown-up now. That’s weird. I have to do grown-up things.

What compels people to post comments on Facebook? What compels people to comment at all. I post maybe 3 or 4 times a day, but I almost never comment. I can’t add anything to the posts. I’ll like, but almost never comment.