Self, Where Are You?

We spend our lives, our time, and our resources trying to better ourselves. Self-improvement isn’t such a bad thing. I mean, it’s good to want to be the best YOU, you can be. But really, what are we exactly looking for? Better yet, who are we looking for?

Maybe we’re looking for someone who doesn’t really exist. What if who I am after isn’t really who I am but cultural pressures to be someone other than myself? That was quite the mouthful.

We are all in a pursuit of our truest self. We explore things that we enjoy, instruments that make us happy, careers that seem like a good idea, buy clothes and goods to make us feel important. What are we trying to be? Who are we trying to be? In Western culture we have been sucked into the vortex of consumerism. We buy things we don’t need to impress people we don’t know. All in an attempt, that maybe just maybe, we might feel a little significant. All the while, who we really are, our genuine true self is being stuffed down further and further with praise or criticism.

I’m not really into self-help things. I’ve read a few books on this but they all pretty much say the same thing. I’ve only discovered some of my true self by believing in Jesus. I’m a christian but not the type of christian who believe’s the world is going to hell in a hand basket, and there are the “elect” of God and some are just unlucky and didn’t get picked. I believe in a God who became a man in the person of Jesus. In becoming a human, He reveals to us that He is close and that He counts Himself among us. He touched the outcast and the elite. No one is beyond His reach. That in itself is revolutionary. God taking on human flesh reveals to me that being human is not gross and detestable to Him. While I am not into self-help, I am into discovering our true identity in the love of God.

“I believe Jesus calls all of us to let go of the desire to appear good, to give up the appearance of being good, so that we can listen to the word within us and move in the mystery of who we are. The preoccupation with projecting the perfect image, of being a model christian and edifying others with our virtues, leads to self-consciousness, sticky pedestal behavior, and bondage to human respect…”Give up being a saint. It’ll be a lot better for everybody.”

This is a quote from the book I am currently reading. When I read this, everything in me shouted Yes! Yes! Yes! We are so preoccupied with projecting the perfect self image that as we do that we blind ourselves to the mystery of we were made to be. Inwardly, our spirit calls out to us to be released in the Earth. You see, you and I have something extremely special. There’s something special about us. There has never been and never will be another one of us. When we become consumed with our self-image, the people around us don’t get to know us, they get to know the version of us we want them to know.

Freedom has many aspects to it. It could be culturally, physically, spiritually, financially or whatever else. I like ULTIMATE FREEDOM. And ultimate freedom to me is freedom from the praise and recognition of people. Could I, could we, be OK if we never got any recognition? If we never got any honor or esteem? What if we went through this life in the shadows all the while effecting the entire of humanity? After all, its NOT ONLY the ones in the spotlight who leave a mark. As we continue with each day, we can be even more free by allowing ourselves to live and not just exist. We live by being loved by God to discover who we are. I can only find myself in His love. I may be able to find what I like to do, or things that I apart from knowing Him but only in being loved by Him and experiencing that love can I find who I really am.

“The majority of hurts in our lives, the endless massaging of the latest bruise to our wounded ego, feelings of anger, grudges, resentment, and bitterness come from…our obsession with our rights, and our need for esteem in the eyes of others.”

Our true self lies hidden and longs to be discovered and explored. We make the journey more difficult when we need people to see us. To acknowledge how great we are. When people don’t see our goodness and treat us a certain way, we get hurt. We get hurt because we have found ourselves in the approval and acceptance of other people. We need people to agree with us to enjoy them. However, the goodness and the greatness we want people to see is only the goodness we allow them and want them to see and ultimately when people see the good image we’ve put on, we get hurt cause we worked so hard to make sure we are liked. We can experience depth of life and relationships by being authentic. Authenticity comes from the inner exploration of God inside of us, showing us the mystery He placed there.

We are all on this journey of discovering who we are. Beliefs shape this. Thoughts shape this. Our environment shapes this. Shake off the notion that you have to have everything together for people to like you or for you to have friends. Meaningful relationships happen in authenticity and vulnerability. A meaningful life happens in the journey of discovering who you are by exploring the mystery within. You don’t need the acceptance and respect of people, in fact, if that is your goal you will always miss the mark. People were not made for that and neither were you. Free yourself from the expectation of others and you will never be disappointed. We were made, by design, to live free and to live full.

Keep following the thread of the Divine at

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