A Short Meditation On Resolve

in the manner of Juvenal

China was emboldened by the long dithering of Der Wimpenführer. Then he received a colossal injection of testosterone provided by the women of the Congressional Black Caucus. The USN and USAF tested Chinese resolve. The Chinese were so terrified they built another base in the middle of the China Sea. Obama then retaliated by refusing to allow Chinese middlemen acting for their government to purchase more than 98% of the Hollywood film industry.

The Chinese leadership is already howling like 200 middle-aged and older pink cat hatters tied to chairs and forced to watch the first Conan The Barbarian film with Arnold in the room drinking a fifth of Red Label and ten Viagra dissolving in his system. The Chinese leadership is making ominous veiled threats. They have ceased using iPhones and switched to Samsung. They are gnashing their teeth over T telling them they can’t have Taiwan, thereby, astonishingly, reversing America’s sacred post-Korean War policy of leaving our trusting allies to get hit by the 16 wheeler of history without even a pack of Oreos. Of course, nobody in the MSM has noticed this historic reversal of American policy which has made us the number one pick for an ally by nations addicted to bondage and S&M.

with thanks to Swift and Celiné

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