A white guy’s primer for other whites in the aftermath of George Floyd’s murder ⋆ As published in The Michigan Advance

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Listen up, Goldilocks. No one has the time or patience for your moral relativism and false-equivalencies bullshit anymore. Too hard. Too soft. Too damn bad. “Just right” is for children’s stories. This is the real world.


Restrictions are not an attack on our freedoms

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Photo by Justin Casey on Unsplash

A United States Navy veteran and friend asked me to publish this. He wants us to realize what freedom means to him, and many other veterans, as they reflect “it could have been me” on this Memorial Day Weekend. The author wishes to remain anonymous.

The first day I returned home from war, there was no parade, no fireworks, no hashtags. …


How to better combine your astounding ignorance and poor writing skills.

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“Write what you know.” That’s where so much writing advice begins. From high school creative writing class to columns about online blogging, freelancing, and self-publishing, we are indoctrinated with instruction and guidance to stick to our experiences and knowledge to find our voice and improve our abilities to persuade, inspire, entertain, or educate using the written word.

But most people don’t know shit, and many of them want to be writers. Why shouldn’t they? Their subject matter is infinite and the potential audience is ginormous.

If you’re thinking you don’t know shit but still want to write about your staggering…


Read what they have to say in their own words — sort of.

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The blokes with the powdered wigs and knee-breeches.

Our Dearest Progeny,

It’s us. The Founding Fathers. Ye know, the blokes with the powdered wigs and knee-breeches. We’re breaching (see what we did there?) the time-space continuum to implore you lot to stop buggering up the American system.

We wrote the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, and other historical cack. We also put our pence where our pens were (no pun intended). …


The circus is coming to town

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Photo by Mark Williams on Unsplash

Prepare yourself for The Apprentice Survivor Idol Veepstakespalooza in the lead-up to the Republican nominating convention. A reality show-type competition to select his second term running mate is too perfectly Trumpian for it not to happen. He’ll invite Vice President Mike Pence to reapply, but his job will be made available to a host of eager applicants.

The selection process will be made public via Donald Trump’s Twitter account, his public utterances, comments of various informed surrogates, and well-placed leaks to the press. There will be a gradual winnowing of the field to heighten the drama and create competition in…


An allegory about today’s politics

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Photo by Marek Szturc on Unsplash

We all know the fable of The Boy Who Cried Wolf and its moral; don’t sound the alarm unless an actual threat exists, or no one will believe your warnings when danger is imminent. Conversely, refusal to heed calls of ‘Wolf!’ in the face of actual peril is also a shameful lesson that needs to be taught. Here’s a variation of the tale that has a bearing on our present-day politics.

Once upon a time, there was a village. The villagers coexisted peacefully and were relatively prosperous, though differences and political factions existed among the villagers. There was a group…


A GOP insider is fed up with Trump enablers

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(UPDATED April 20, 2020)

It used to be said that many Democratic voters, especially in the South, would choose a “yellow dog” before casting a ballot for a Republican. The term originated in the late 1800s. It didn’t matter who the candidate was or what they actually sought to achieve in office. They only thing that mattered was they were a Democrat and not a godforsaken Republican. I suppose that describes me now.

That’s not a small thing to say.

Supporting Democrats goes against my political DNA. I’ve advised and directed hundreds of Republican legislative, congressional, statewide campaigns — including…


Some say he represents the future of the GOP. If so, the post-Trump party won’t change much.

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Image from @hurdonthehill Instagram

Congressman Will Hurd of Texas stood out as the worst Republican during the Impeachment Hearings. “What? Why is that?” you say? Amidst all the ridiculous behavior and grandstanding of Republicans like Devin Nunes, Jim Jordan, and John Ratcliffe, the reflective and soft-spoken Hurd appeared to many to be a model of duty and restraint. Yet despite irrefutable evidence of wrongdoing and obstruction by Trump and his cohorts, Hurd came down on the same side as Nunes, Jordan, and their Ukraine clown posse and announced his opposition to holding the President accountable.

Hurd has been seen by many as a rising…


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1956 Lobby Card via WikiCommons

Trump is the parasite, House Republicans are the hosts

This week will lay bare the fact House Republicans, greater Party, and the related conservative ranks are comprised almost exclusively of two types of people — the aggressive parasites and the docile hosts. Invasion of the Body Snatchers on full display (and it seems a divine irony that the original 1956 film starred an actor named Kevin McCarthy as the lead).

In today’s GOP there is an interloping master — and there are the infected and enslaved minions who are corrupted and controlled by the invader and his henchmen. There is nothing in between, just craven servility, dishonor, and decay…


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Image Credit DonkeyHotey on WikiCommons

Will He Also Be His Executioner?

Donald Trump’s presidency has been seen to hinge on his ability to engender [take your pick] personal or party loyalty, servility, transactional greed, fear, or some combination of these traits of no less than 34 of the 53 Republicans in the United States Senate. That’s been the conventional wisdom. But conventional wisdom can be wrong.

Even though many, perhaps even most, of the GOP senators do not like Trump, they’ve not been willing to risk their individual necks opposing him despite his escalating instability, unpredictability, antics, and scandals. The reasoning goes that they’d never vote to remove him from office…

Jeff Timmer

Michigan political expert. Campaign strategist. Writer. Communicator. Persuader. Erstwhile GOPer. Trump critic. Skilled in smartassery. Twitter.com/@jefftimmer

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