To Be A Hard Ass or Not To Be A Hard Ass?
That is the question….
So to continue my parental self-flagellation, I muse on the issue of parenting in public. It’s a tricky one. I wish I could say there is no difference in my house! But I will be the first to put my hand up and say;
I do not parent in public the same way I do at home!
I wish I could be one of those ‘calm’ mums that religiously gets down to her child at eye level and ‘talks’ to them about how their behavior is ‘unacceptable’ and it won’t be tolerated, then they hug, the child is full of remorse yet has learned a valuable lesson, and they walk off hand in hand in to the sunset, another parenting win in the bag.
But that don’t happen in my world. Because when my daughter is being a total arse-hole (and yes I can say that because she is mine!!) there is no hunkering down, reasoning, happily-ever-after smug mummy moments. I’d say probably one in every four scenarios ends in hot, red faced, stand-off carnage!!
At home, there is a warning, two, three, probably four, then mummy loses the plot because she is juggling reality in the form of an almost-one-year-old that has decided to walk far too early, or dinner, or cleaning, or washing (woe is me, right?) with a very strong willed three year old. Result = Parenting Fail.
And when we are out, well….. I am far more subdued. I am quite a reserved person by nature and I hate nothing more than dirty laundry in public. I even used to hate my husband talking too loudly in restaurants — two kids cured me of that one!! So I am not a mum that likes to raise her voice. I am morto if I have to roar at my three year old to stop running away from me. I want to crawl in to a pit if she is being a total whatsit in playgroup. I squirm when she passes personal remarks to girls in public loos with purple and grey hair (this was a recent embarrassment). Reprimanding is swift and quiet. I have an honors degree in ventriloquism at this stage.
I do let her off with a wee bit more in public, I admit it. I’m sorry! I am not a hard ass, no shit mamma. Secret: I’m actually a bit faffy….!
So go ahead. Throw up those eyebrows, click those pointed tongues, judge me if you will! But I am being honest, and I figure a parent that can acknowledge their failings is a better parent. Hey, maybe that does make me a bit of a hard ass after all….