Me vs. Me

“We have yet to see a ceiling | We just top what we top” — Jay Z

I’ve never let someone tell me what I can’t do. Why, now, start letting someone dictate what I can? The measurement of success trap is tricky.

Social media doesn’t help.

On apps, our friends offer up their prized moments, complete with proud picture and 1–27 paragraph caption. All appears well, and the post Likes and emoticon Laughs and Loves pour in. Comments are the applause and approval we publicly receive and validate our purpose for living. (Sidebar: hyperbole is fun but feels irresponsible.)

Bottom line, I need to spend less time on Facebook.

I’ve caught myself becoming too invested in the accomplishments of others. I generally scroll through a newsfeed rather quickly, scanning headlines and a sentence or two. In the blink of an eye and 8 Likes later, five minutes of my life have gone by.

Five minutes on Facebook may not seem like a lot, but it’s what I’ve lost in those five minutes that’s important.

In giving my time, intelligence, and energy away for free (outside of wishing someone a Happy Birthday), I’ve spent five minutes stacking myself up against others and, more often than not, falling short.

5 minutes of falling short x 365 days = over 30 hours a year of feeling less than. (Sidebar: check that math.)

Thirty hours! My competitive nature does not approve. You know how many times I’ve wished for more hours in a day? A lot of times.

It’s not about how much you sleep… It’s what you do when you’re awake. — Gary Vaynerchuk

TIME is everything.

Where I am right now, today, in this moment, I can see clearly every accomplishment and obstacle I’ve overcome and know I’ve outlasted, out-hustled, and won because I said I would. I did the work and made it happen. There has never been another way. Or, if there was another way, I didn’t see it. I had blinders on to keep my vision focused. The field didn’t matter. Certainly, Facebook didn’t matter.

TIMING is everything.

As an owner of an organization that equalizes the educational playing field and provides preventative public health care for young women, now is most definitely the time to put the blinders on and do what I do. (Sidebar: youngelites.org)

To measure myself against anyone else’s standards of success would set me on pace with their goals. Not mine.

When Jay Z rapped, “We have yet to see a ceiling/ We just top what we top,” he was letting the world know “we’re our only competition, and we keep winning.”

It’s not as much braggadocious as it is a blueprint for becoming successful:

  • Create measurements and benchmarks that match your goals.
  • Reach them.
  • Repeat.

My Facebook friends and I do not have the same stories, experiences, and plans. Therefore, it makes no sense for me to spend 30 hours a year disappointed for not accomplishing their hopes and dreams.

Staying in my lane, eyes focused on my prize, conserves energy, intelligence, and time for my fight.

There’s something to celebrate every single day. (Sidebar: waking up and being alive!) Being included in the big moments my friends make happen is special and something I don’t take for granted. Reliving them on Facebook has become a past time. But, measuring my value under their ceilings is futile. It’s limiting. It’s demotivating.

My worth is what I bring to the room and what no one else can. I beat my body and make it my slave. Not to run their race but mine. Should a couple extra minutes each day open up, I’ll have gained time to train toward my purpose.

In a Me vs. Me match, I like my odds at making it to the top.

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The What About You (WAY):

How do you measure your successes?

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