Jennifer Lourie| Writer | Marketer | Blogger | Kind Human
I get a lot of proactive apologies from people for possibly being “creepy.”
The other day a very nice stranger sent me a lovely email about my blog and then promptly apologized for his own possible creepiness saying he hoped I wouldn’t think he was a “creeper:” This is what I told him:
Don’t worry about being a “creeper.” I have people saying this to me every day, “I wanted to reach out but I didn’t want to seem creepy.” Or, “I wanted to compliment you but I didn’t want to seem creepy.” Don’t worry about it!! If you are a nice, kind, genuine human and someone thinks you are creepy, that is their problem, not yours.”
What is up with this fear of being perceived as a creep? Or perceiving people as creeps who are just being nice?
We all need to calm down.
We need to stop being so afraid of each other. I hate it.
If you have something nice to say to someone, say it.
Compliments are a gift! They can uplift our whole mood, brighten our day, encourage us. Learn how to give and take them. Give compliments that are respectful, genuine, kind, and confidence boosting.
If you are on the other end and someone says something nice to you, accept it. Say thank you! Realize that they might have had to build up their courage to say it and that they might be afraid of how they are going to be perceived.
If you are someone who doesn’t know how to give or receive compliments, fix that!
However, if you are an actual creep who doesn’t know how to engage appropriately with people and respect boundaries, then knock it off. Reflect on that and fix that.
The other day a man on Instagram complimented me on my bunions of all things. He then private messaged me and told me has a foot fetish and particularly likes bunions and he liked mine. But you know what? His compliment was nice. He was polite. Who cares if he has a foot fetish? Some people just like what they like. I could have thought that was creepy but you know what? If I chose to think that, I would have missed out on having his compliment actually make me feel less self conscious about how my feet look!
So yeah, just worry about if you are nice and kind and encouraging and supportive and if someone takes that as creepiness, move on and share your good vibes with someone who will appreciate them.