Honoring and Holding Space

For Yourself and for Others

“Do I contradict myself? I contain multitudes.” — Walt Whitman

Let’s talk about holding and honoring space. As I navigate through life’s multitudes from what’s unfolding this year with my art, my friendships, and my relationships- old and new — I’m beginning to grasp the immense value and gift of holding space for yourself and for others you care about. 
What is holding space? For me- when you hold space, you are willing to walk alongside them (and yourself) without judgement, without expectations. You bring your complete presence to them. You release control, you surrender. By allowing space to breathe between each other, you empower them to make their own choices on their own volition. Even when the choices others make may not align with what you desire, by letting space breathe, you’re allowing an opportunity for truth to unfold.

When in doubt, when I weaken, when the anxiety takes over and threatens my security and my sanity, when it makes my flight through life annoyingly terrifying — because let’s face it, allowing space when all your inner child wants to do is to latch on to immediate comfort from the fears that the ‘silence’ unearths…is excruciatingly painful. However, to transcend this hedonic adaptation of how I seek release from my fears, to almost rewire myself (because obviously I want my relationships to get stronger and last forever), I’m learning to allow silence to seep in and picture being completely present with that person I care about. In most cases, that person is myself. I’m learning to offer and accept my imperfect self. I’m learning to trust that my heart and my mind will align in this silence and this chaos within will implode into an ecstatic release of freedom.

In the end, you heal, you grow, you transform. And what an incredibly liberating gift this is. For yourself and to others.