On nearing the end:
Well. It’s finally time to admit that my time in Utah is coming to an end. I’m leaving in just under 3 weeks (still trying to get a flight for mid-November). We did not make playoffs, unfortunately, so it’s time to go for me. I’m very excited to get home, eat Chinese food, show my mom all the food I’ve been making out here, maybe go workout with my dad, and see my family again. Most of all, I’m excited to get the rest of this gap year underway with my second job and a potential very exciting volunteer opportunity (I’ve been visualizing this for about 2 weeks now).
There are a few annoying things I still have to do before I leave, like getting some licensure for a state about 2,500 miles away, and figuring out how to transfer my medical and dental records and all that fun healthcare stuff, and changing my addresses again…but it’s more so just a realization that this is what growing up is like. There are some really annoying parts, but there are also some really great parts.
I don’t think I’m very sad about leaving, perhaps because I know I’ll be back. And perhaps I’ve acknowledged that fact that although places mean a lot to me, I’m not sad to leave because I’ve taken so much out of this opportunity of living in Salt Lake City for 6 months. Not too many people get to live in such a beautiful place for a little bit. This will be an experience I’ll never forget. I’m considering some kind of tattoo that will represent all the places that have really touched my heart. I haven’t got the crazy travel bug, I haven’t got the money or the time — but there are certain places that seem pretty ordinary to some, but are actually absolutely incredible to me.
Nearing the end is sad, but it’s also exciting because that means I get another beginning. I mean, kind of, living at home is obviously something I’ve experienced before. But I get these next 7–8 months to really get some new certifications under my belt, get great experiences/save up for graduate school, and hopefully get into school, that might help huh? I’ll get time to go to the gym, maybe join that adult water polo league I’ve been talking about, and I’ll get time to spend with my parents before that starts to dwindle because of my career choice. But hey, that’s life, and I know I’ll keep a great relationship with them even after I move out.
Nearing the end can be pretty scary because maybe you don’t know what you’re going to do next. Even when you do have a plan, a lot can happen, and a lot can change really quickly and randomly. I just want to encourage anyone who’s reading this and feels that the end of an experience is near and you’re scared of it — you’re going to figure it out. But it won’t happen if you just sit there and freak out. I mean, yes, there are times when “freaking out” might almost be necessary and unavoidable, but after that, make a plan and make things happen.
Sometimes I feel bad saying this stuff, because truthfully, I haven’t gone through some of the tough things my friends have gone through — family diseases, family problems, etc. But I know the feeling of thinking life is never going to change or get better, and the feeling of being a failure. It may take longer to “get over it”, and it may not be something you can get over — it might just be something you have to deal with, but something that you can try and alleviate by caring for yourself. The end of one thing is the beginning of another, just remember, even if you don’t know what it is yet. Life has a funny way of working itself out (but you’ve got to put work in too!).
I guess it’s time to near the end of this post…time to go read The Sports Gene and do some movements, I’m pretty stiff from all the swimming and sitting I’ve done today!