Why Am I Watching ‘The Defiant Ones — Part 3’?

Jeremy Lambert
Jul 30, 2017 · 3 min read
  1. How well would Jimmy Iovine and Daniel Bryan get along?
  2. If this episode is about Snoop Dogg is it automatically the best part of any documentary ever?
  3. What’s the best Dr. Dre album?
  4. The one Snoop Dogg wrote, the one Eminem wrote, or the one Kendrick Lamar wrote?
  5. Can you name three better writers across three different eras?
  6. Anyone else shocked to know that Snoop Dogg freestyled?
  7. Is anyone shocked that they named the album The Chronic while on chronic?
  8. Do people care about these rich white people?
  9. We want more of Snoop, right?
  10. So we have Jimmy Iovine to blame for Rico Sauve?
  11. Why does young Gwen Stefani look like Brittany Murphy?
  12. Does Gwen Stefani age?
  13. WHO IS THIS OOMPLA LOOMPA HAIR LOOKIN DUDE?!?!?!?!
  14. How much did this guy get paid to be on this documentary with that hair?
  15. Anyone else surprised that Iovine didn’t invent the iPhone based on his love of phones?
  16. Is Jimmy Iovine’s new talent just annoying the shit out of people?
  17. Can Jimmy Iovine run my favorite sports team?
  18. Are young people watching this confused by cassettes?
  19. Why are Dr. Dre beats timeless?
  20. Anyone not surprised that Snoop was looting?
  21. Would Dr. Dre have been a success on SoundCloud?
  22. Does anyone actually shop their record nowadays?
  23. Like, if I walked into a record label and tried to shop them my record, what would they say?
  24. How many Twitter followers you got?
  25. Why does Dre look so uncomfortable in the Nuttin But A G Thang video?
  26. WHO THE FUCK IS MICK AND KEITH?!?!?!
  27. Suge Knight hung out and played football with the fucking Kennedy’s?
  28. Would Snoop have been charged with murder if he were high?
  29. Does Snoop stay high to stay out of trouble?
  30. Did Dre just call Bloods vs. Crips “exciting”?
  31. Is Dr. Dre problematic?
  32. So Manson recorded in the Manson house?
  33. How many late 90’s kids are hearing these Marilyn Manson and Nine Inch Nails lyrics and thinking, “I thought Limp Bizkit wrote this”?
  34. How lucky is Dre that he didn’t end up like DOC?
  35. Are they just gonna play music this entire part instead of telling the story?
  36. Is that why that why this part is the longest?
  37. How freaked out are people listening to Tupac talk about Donald Trump in 1992?
  38. Did they not get Marilyn Manson for this documentary?
  39. Is that the biggest miss?
  40. Or is not getting Tupac’s hologram the biggest miss?
  41. Did this white dude get that scar on his face from saying the N word to the wrong people?
  42. How big of a rap fan was Bill Clinton?
  43. Would anyone be shocked to learn that I typed “Big” instead of “Bill”?
  44. Is saying “this is baseball” when someone proclaims themselves as the Michael Jordan of something the best comeback ever?
  45. There’s no way Suge is in this documentary, right?
  46. Why do you think Suge didn’t do the documentary?
  47. Did Suge fund that diner?
  48. It doesn’t take a genius to know what’s going to happen at the 95 Source Awards does it?
  49. Who would win a fight between Dre and Puffy?
  50. What did Suge say that was wrong?
  51. Like, we all accept that Puffy is in all the videos and dancing, right?
  52. Is Suge the most disrespectful person in rap history?
  53. What would a rapper from Kansas sound like?
  54. How weird does Tupac look with hair?
  55. Does anyone understand the true life and genius of Tupac?
  56. What would Tupac think of a bunch of white people bailing him out?
  57. Is there a better state anthem than California Love?
  58. Does Tupac know he’s wearing a UNC jersey?
  59. Were Dre, Snoop, Pac, and Suge the original Black Beatles?
  60. Will Dre write a tell-all about Death Row on his death bed?
  61. What do you think Jimmy’s 40 time would be?
  62. Are you friends with anyone who doesn’t think Don’t Speak is No Doubt’s best song?
  63. That is…no doubt their best song, right?
  64. Why was Stevie Nicks at Jimmy’s house when Jimmy was married?
  65. How lyrically fantastic would a true Nas vs. Tupac beef had been?
  66. Will anyone famous get shot after the McGregor vs. Mayweather fight?
  67. Is that Chris Rock bit the first thought of anyone when they hear about Tupac getting shot?

Welcome to a place where words matter. On Medium, smart voices and original ideas take center stage - with no ads in sight. Watch
Follow all the topics you care about, and we’ll deliver the best stories for you to your homepage and inbox. Explore
Get unlimited access to the best stories on Medium — and support writers while you’re at it. Just $5/month. Upgrade