The Guilt Offering or A Bridge Too Far

My birthday is tomorrow. This is not some landmark year like 30 or 40 or 65, just another forty-something birthday. But last year was a lost year. Perhaps another day when that year is further in the rear view mirror of life, I’ll be able to write about it. But for now, let’s just say that this birthday has to make up for the one I missed last year, too.

On Monday, my lovely wife informed me that I was getting a recliner for my birthday. Her mother was redecorating and we could go pick up the recliner on my birthday.

I replied, “But I don’t want a recliner.”

“You've always wanted a recliner, what are you talking about?”

“There’s no where to put it unless you get rid of something.”

“We can get rid of the brown chair,” she offered.

“No, the brown chair matches the brown couch. The recliner is a bluish color. Pick something else to get rid of.”

The conversation continued on for just a bit longer, but she knew I was right.

We were having this conversation because, in our very normal fashion, my birthday is little more than an afterthought. My oldest son shares a birthday with me. And since the day he was born, my birthday, even my fortieth, has not been a priority. I really don’t mind so much. I’m not big on celebrating other people’s birthdays, so I don’t really care much about mine.

But this year, about three weeks ago, I let her know what I wanted to do for my birthday. It just so happens that The Ruby Revue has a show tomorrow night, on my birthday. My request was for her to take me to The Ruby Revue.

It also happened that The Ruby Revue show had a Groupon available until a few days ago for only 25% of the regular price. For $50, we could have gone to the show, bought a couple of drinks each and tipped the valet. Seemed like a pretty cheap birthday date, to me. But the Groupon is over, and the tickets alone cost over $50 each now.

In case you didn't click on the link earlier, The Ruby Revue is a burlesque show. From my perspective, this would have been a wonderful and unique experience. In her eyes, though, it might as well have been a strip club.

Apparently, despite this being a birthday request, this was a bridge she was not willing to cross with me or for me.

So instead, perhaps as a guilt offering, she offered a used recliner.