Musings | #9
Colon Mark on My Calico Cat
“… I have to find the continuous meaning of my life after that colon.”
A crescent moon above the purple morning sky.
“Cuit, cuit,” the birds are chirping loudly.
Still in my pajamas with my soles wearing black slippers to witness this new day, new month.
5:30 AM, it is not the time for the morning sun to show her existence to the world, yet.
My skin can feel the coolness of morning dew.
Oh, here you are!
My little sweety calico cat is actively finding something fun to play with.
It was not unusual thing for her to bite anything — and anyone as well.
Oh, look at this little creature’s face,
I really can’t handle this kind of cuteness!
Never in my life had I seen her face boring. Never!
“Cantik aku,” I keep saying that — it means my pretty by the way — to my calico baby all the time.
Don’t forget about her little paws that make her able to climb everything: my sofa, my bed, my carpet, the trees, etc.
Last but not least, there’s a colon mark on her body!
Yes, this (:), is so unique and cute, right?
One of the colon’s duty is to explain something. My thoughts wandered.
Maybe, in the middle of my existential crisis era, God wants me to remember through Lili (my cat’s name) that I have to find the continuous meaning of my life after that colon.
“Jesica’s Purpose in Life:”
Grrr, my teeth are literally grinding because I want to bite her! (I’m sorry for this inconvenience about my obsession with my little calico cat).
Ah, I’ve just looked at my gallery to see when was her birthday again.
It was 21 March 2024, she’s about 5 months old.
And just realized, it is… August now, the tenth month of the year.
2025 is three months away and I am not ready, yet.
Sometimes, I feel like I’m just walking but only in the place where I’m standing — nowhere.
Walking into an uncertain void, I don’t know if there’d be a glimmer of sunlight out there to shine my way through.
I feel lost.
I don’t know which step I should take my feet into.
I don’t know which direction is right.
There’s no sign to guide my way to the right destination where I should be.
I can’t just follow everyone’s advice about how they finally found their purpose in life on YouTube, right?
We come from different starts.
We stick to different principles as well.
We walk in our paths.
That’ll be okay, I guess.
As long as this nose can still breathe the air freely.
As long as I can still open my eyes to see, my feet to walk, my tongue to taste, my ears to listen, my hands to touch.
It’s just I have to find the continuous meaning of my life after that colon.
It doesn’t matter if it takes slower than others,
I don’t and shouldn’t compare my pace with others, right?
Easier to said than done, indeed.
But hey, since when life is easy to live?
Even when we were just born into this world, we didn’t laugh but cried instead.
It was the sign, perhaps?
Bonus pic of Lili:
Thank you for reading!
With Love,
Jesica ❤
