Turning My Life over to A Spiritual One


In the 12 steps, you assign yourself a Higher Power/God. The thing is, people outside take this as a wholly religious/Christian viewpoint and shun away from it. Imma dispel that right now — that’s not what it is.

They use the word God as an umbrella term for reference — your God is different from someone else’s God, which is different from someone else’s God.

All “God” means is that you agree there is a chance that there is something bigger than you in the world. You have to release control into something other at force. Whatever that is, is up to you.

So, I’ll let you into my head: My “Guiding Spirit” is the Statistically Improbable Universe.

Who manifests itself into looking like this:

I mean, what are the fucking odds that I’d be alive at the time where some stranger thousands of miles away from me would unknowingly immortalize every fiber of who I am as a person into a drawing of a cat.

THE ODDS, MAN, THE ODDS!

So anyway, here’s what happens when I turn the control over to something else: Whenever I feel like I’m going into a bad mood, or I’m overthinking things, or whatever, when I catch myself going down the rabbit hole, I stop, take a breath, and let lil’ Pusheen here take my mind over. I’m no longer in control, I accept it, and I move onto the things that I have to do to find peace.

It’s amazing. I started doing chores. I started meditating in a routine. I started being kinder. I started being happy to do the menial things in life. I started giving more. I started relaxing more. I’m not in control, and I’m beginning to be okay with it.

This isn’t a one time thing. This is something I’ll have to do for the rest of my life, but for some reason, I’m really fucking okay with it.

I’m not in control. Never was, never have been. And when I do try to control things, shit never goes my way.

It’s peaceful, just the thought in itself. Let life happen and enjoy.

With love & toodleloos,
~Jess

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