Plus a bonus: I haven’t had major anxiety this gardening season
I’m not a Master Gardener. My thumb is barely green. Hobbit-skills are something I strive to have, but only succeed at some of the time. Still, here I am. It’s nearing the end of June and I’m tanned from hours upon hours in the sunshine out in my bare feet or funky flower clustered garden clogs while yanking up weeds, tearing out trees, and moving compost and mulch, so I could get to planting all the lovely things.
My kids and I have expanded our garden beds and planted a variety of new plants — we were in quarantine this…
A POEM
He dreams in shades of green and red
small and curvy
plump and juicy
in shapes of varying circles
“Tomato soup. Tomato bread.”
Happily he waters rows
gently lays a straw blanket down
picking weed-monsters daring
to pop up in his little dreamland
“Tomato soup. Tomato bread.”
As the sun warms his brow
sweat drips down his face
this dreamer looks at his mama
grinning ear to ear and says,
“This best part about all this hard work is it will pay off with delicious tomatoes. …
Which path to take?
Which decision is best for the most people involved?
For me. For my loved ones.
Every choice means I didn’t choose the other thing: the other path that is equally important. Equally exciting. Full of good and promise and so much hope for the future.
But this other path, the one I am already embarked on, it has had tough mountains to climb. It has thorny bushes scratching and digging into my flesh and I know they will not disappear.
Their presence makes the other path look friendly and inviting. But I am not a fool…
The time comes
when it doesn’t matter anymore
the pain
the sadness
the regret
the time comes to let it all go
that time may be because it’s too late
to say the things that hurt your soul
stunted your growth
made you struggle and fight through life
too late because
no one can reply from below the earth
even if their soul flies to the heavens.
Or maybe the time comes because you see now
the old — when did they become old? — turn child-like now
child-like in need of your help
and you see them in a…
POETRY
Once the seasons blow their winds,
Rain their torrents,
Blanket the world in white silence
One can clear the landscape of weeds
Trim back wild trees and roses
Pruning all unnecessary chaos
Making a canvas ready for beauty and grace
Cleared garden beds for fruits and flowers
Perfectly laid plans for spring growth and renewal
The courtyard of my soul,
Garden of my life,
Awaits for me to water the seeds I’ve sown
Seeds sometimes given to me
Open handed and willing
To learn the wisdom of others
Generous enough to share with me
Seeds sought after and hunted down
Some…
The tastes and smells of summer can fight off the winter blues!
Are you suffering through winter and longing for summer as much as I am? I’m in the Midwest so naturally, everything is covered in snow, ice, and coldness. I’m longing for spring and summer by this point of winter…and it’s no where in sight.
Except summer did make an appearance in my kitchen this morning and is marinating on the counter waiting to be served on a plate for dinner.
The tastes and smells of summer at least.
I went to Costco the other day and there was a big box of on-the-vine tomatoes calling to me. I know they…
Poetry
I need a long train ride
a trip to the sea
On this train every chug along the track
will bring me closer to the vast ocean and the waves
reminding me,
I don’t need to have all the answers
I don’t need to have life figured out,
each and every step,
because those plans and steps are like sandcastles
magnificent and kingly
only for a short while,
and like the deep footprints left along the shore
leaving an impression,
only for a few moments in time
Castles disappear
no matter how grandiose they are
quickly,
footprints fill with water,
swiftly sand shifts…
POETRY
They look on in admiration
Seeing a real-life heroine before their eyes
She needs no helping hands, no kind gestures, nor invites
It is she who does the helping, the giving, the entertaining
All graciously, beautifully, like Superwoman in disguise
They look on without seeing
Her exhaustion hidden behind a warm smile
Behind laughing eyes and busy helping hands
They tell her, ‘You can do this!’ and ‘I believe in you!’
Taking for granted when she succeeds because
They ‘always knew she could’
No one understands what Superwoman sees in the mirror:
She doesn’t actually fit the suit,
Doesn’t remember putting…
If I don’t, I won’t accomplish what I want.
I’m not a fan of routines and schedules, not strict ones anyway. They just don’t work well with my lifestyle or personality. I do appreciate and need loose routines and schedules — ones that make room for all the unexpected that comes with being a mother of a large homeschooling family. I’m in need of a loose routine now because I have some serious writing goals I intend to meet.
Maybe you can get some ideas for yourself after reading what I’m doing.
First, of course, I need to finish working…
POETRY
Burdened by the weight of expectations
Unfairly placed upon my back from birth
When born as a woman, of a certain race, in a specific place
And, when born anew, to a certain creed, a distinct tradition
Each time I was given, more than I deserved
More to strive for, more to be
More to answer for, more to fail to become
I did not deserve the expectations placed upon my head
More, more, more, I was never more to the degree of enough
Maybe here and there
In snippets and in doses
Measuring enough to fill a glass
Occasionally
To keep dehydration from…
